Race_9togo

Oct 28, 2013 ⭐ View statistics (Premium feature)

Listening

On the edge of clifftops
Stretching from the darkened South
To Northward glow of distant town
We lay upon the fragrant grass
Night's soft touch cool on our skins
And watched the glitter of the stars
Until our passions took control
And led us into urgency
And eagerness-

-"but what was that?"

I heard the endless surge of Llyr
Rolling to the shore in moonlit waves,
Brigantia whispering on the path,
Her skirts all damp with dew,
I heard Nodens breathing on the beach below,
Colluis pulling rattling stones from cliffs,
Maponus sigh His pleasure at our lingering
And Cernunnos shake His antlered head
To stamp impatience at our pause...

"It's just the wind," I said.

http://vocaroo.com/i/s03OvPTL2s6r

About This Poem

Style/Type: Free verse

Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back

Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft

About the Author

Region, Country: Earth Vicinity (within a five light-year radius), ZZC

Favorite Poets: John Donne, T.S. Eliot, Serendipity, Emily Dickenson, Kailashana, Charles Bukowski, Kabir, Rett, Dalton, W. B. Yeats, William Blake, Rainer Maria Rilke, and many other Neopoet poets; Neopoet has heavily influenced my poetry and my ability to write it well.

Comments

China Blue

11 years 8 months ago

race

I find nothing to correct or suggest. I've been away awhile however your writing still remains a pleasure to read. Love the last line of this owrk

Race_9togo

11 years 8 months ago

Hi Chrys,

Thanks for reading, and enjoying.
Its good to see you posting again, after this past couple of months. Dare I ask when your next poem will be presented? Soon, I sincerely hope.

Thanks again,

China Blue

11 years 8 months ago

Jim

Thanks kindly in answer to your question Perhaps

scribbler

11 years 8 months ago

Hi James

It is obvious that you are better read in classical lit. than I am lol. But even without knowing the characters you refer to I still enjoyed the read.............stan

Race_9togo

11 years 8 months ago

Hey Stan,

Its Jim, its Jim? No one calls me James, that's my son's name!
:D

The characters involved are all Celtic Gods and Godesses, some British, some Irish, some Gaulish.
Glad you enjoyed this.

brittle light

11 years 8 months ago

you are one of my favorites..

you are one of my favorites...

especially when your gift of language and the ability to "pop" the lines combine, creating
very strong impressions without having to wrack my brain for comprehension.

I like this piece, its mood, and whimsey and poetic ease.... beautifully written

Please excuse me if I fail to comment on everything. You and I have been in and out of neopoet for a long time
so I think you'll understand ....we do what we can do!
nice corresponding (occasionally) with you again

Race_9togo

11 years 8 months ago

Hey Al, long time no see,

I know what you mean - we most of us have lives beyond cyberspace!
Thank you for reading, and enjoying. Yes, I try to make things as simple as possible in most of my poetry; having to take the time to unravel meaning is not what poetry's about, imo. Its about the suspension of time, the building of images and emotions in the mind of another, and above all, enjoying what it does for and to those who read your poems.
Thanks again,

Nordic cloud

11 years 8 months ago

I loved this,

I loved this,
The whispering wind creating thoughts like the wafting of a forest fire,
the smell of the embers and the taste of the dew,
the firing of the imagination into passions arms,
the turmoil in the still.

Love Ann

Race_9togo

11 years 8 months ago

Thanks Anne,

For your reading and your enjoyment, which is my own.

Seren

11 years 8 months ago

Hello Old Friend

First off your poem is brilliant as only you can be I thought you created such ambience and intimacy even with all that's going on in the second stanza, this is the sort of poetry I have missed reading.

Now, Big Big Smile, I have missed you ! I've had a few health issues one of which was a condition called Cauda Equina Syndrome nearly ended up in a wheelchair but they fixed me up. I have to take it easy for a while, I have one more surgery to come and then I am going to be good as new on all fronts :D

its so good to be back

((((((((((((((((((hugs))))))))))))))))))

love JC xxx

Race_9togo

11 years 8 months ago

Hi Jayne,

Its very, very good to see you back with us. I have missed you also, and I hope your family is well.
Thanks for your opinion of my poem, I wasn't really sure that I pulled off what I wanted to, with this. Another real event, from my mis-spent youth.

I'm familiar with CES, and its, well, a serious, serious bitch. I hope the next surgery helps, and please, do take it easy, it's nothing to laugh at, or take lightly. I hope you'll stay though. You don't have to write, you don't have to be serious, just stay, and enjoy what we write, it may take your mind away from the pain and other symptoms, if only for awhile. Let me know when you're going to have the next procedure done, so I can send you some strength and some light, okay?

Love u, sister.

>>>large virtual hug<<<