The Lost Samurai

She walked in the garden with flowers in her hair

Sounds of melancholy strings filled the night air

The pond was full of roses that had begun to fade

In a glass case in front of her, her lost lover laid

In her eyes, cold tears fell as she began to cry

She wept over her lost love, her lost Samurai

He was struck a mighty blow while at a far war

He fought bravely but was failed by his sword

In his last moments, he could only think of her

Of her tender lips and her sweet smell of myrrh

As he died, wondering would she think of him again

He died in battle from wounds that did not mend

About This Poem

Editing Stage: Editing - polished draft

About the Author

Region, Country: Southwest United States, USA

Favorite Poets: Edgar Allen Poe, Jim Morrison, Sylvia Plath

Comments

Geezer

2 years 7 months ago

Tears...

"In her eyes, cold tears fell as she began to cry"

I think that perhaps I would have said:

From her eyes, hot tears fell as she began to cry

I liked the near-rhyme of war and sword. ~ Geezer.
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Depressed 1

2 years 7 months ago

Thanks

Thanks Geezer for reading and the suggestion. I feel that "cold" reflects the way she felt inside.

Geezer

2 years 7 months ago

I did...

reflect upon that very thing. ~ Geez.
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Lavender

2 years 7 months ago

Even though this is about a violent death and tragic loss, there is a quiet essence to it - flowers in her hair, roses in the water, and for me, the most delicate, the sweet smell of myrrh. All of this makes the poem feel like a Japanese painting of a time long ago, yet reflects on any loved lost in war. I enjoyed this piece.
Thank you,
L