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Maintain silence

At times silence
is appreciated
much more than noise

I always remain silent
as deafness overpowers

others simply hate
screeching voices at the palate

silent folks
don't realize
others are not deaf
they yell
at the top of their voice
breaking absolute silence
they have no other choice
they yell
get out of here
go to hell

O friendly poets
your silence
is so soft and sweet
accept
my noisiness

About This Poem

Style/Type: Free verse

Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back

Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft

About the Author

Region, Country: UNIVERSE...ETERNITY C/O ME, ROU

Favorite Poets: All across the Internet whom I read , and they inspire..

More from this author

Comments

S

Sparrow 42

5 years 9 months ago

Loved

A very strong write.
You have always been secretive in who or where you are so all you can expect is a little caution from others lol.
Take care young Bard, one day you will walk closer to us.
Yours, Ian ..

lovedly

lovedly

5 years 9 months ago

old yes Gee @80 ish

I compose poetry
off the cuff
you all edit it

All my poems have some basis
a point to make
so one does learn
lol

Eumolpus

Eumolpus

5 years 9 months ago

deafness

is a great metaphor is a poem concerning voice, poetry, connection. I would try to explore that more.
Drop the first stanza, which is a command which does not find reference in the poem. Most poetry I find can drop the "so" "thus" and "but"
Here's how I might see the poem:

at times silence
is appreciated
much more than noise

I always remain silent
as deafness overpowers

others simply hate
screeching voices at the palate

silent folks
don't realize
others are not deaf
they yell
at the top of their voice
breaking absolute silence
they have no other choice
they yell
get out of here
go to hell

O friendly poets
your silence
is so soft and sweet
accept
my noisiness

I would end there. I have no idea what the last stanza line is implying. It's coming out of nowhere and i can't see the connection of both disgust ( a most powerful word ) and the eating. I have highlighted the paradox of the poem by ending with noisiness, what you are looking for in the poem.
My take.

lovedly

lovedly

5 years 9 months ago

excellent Eumolpus

done it thanks
you have given
a new life
to my deafness

amendments accomplished

Rottiestyl

Rottiestyl

5 years 9 months ago

Loved

I really liked this. Loved the last stanza. Accept your noisiness as the poet words speak aloud. Love the imagery. ; )

lovedly

lovedly

5 years 9 months ago

yes thanks

I have composed three silent /silence poems
over an expanse of time
Mark out the difference or indifference
as passes human time