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L

Metamorphosis

Metamorphosis

In silent zeal an ego chases images of self
round about the center of its Id
a rodent knocking knick knacks from an overcrowded shelf
where relics of deceit are often hid

reflections in a mirror are but visions to the blind
peering into realms of inner space
hoping that some miracle of faith will help them find
long forgotten memories of face

the clown observes its own demise while capering in fear
across the center ring of circus fate
clearly underestimating shadows that appear
as nothing more than jugglers running late

a paragon of goodness tumbles into webs of sin
while preaching to a choir full of mimes
stubbornly believing virtue comes from deep within
and blatantly ignoring holy rhymes

in silent zeal an ego catches glimpses of the truth
as its Id lies hiding in suspense
a rodent praying for a hole, no matter how uncouth
where it can lie preparing its defense

the mirror’s visions fade to black, the clown accepts a death
that paragons of goodness fail to see
as all the casts of passion plays await with baited breath
the dying of their savior on the tree

C. Lon R. Bruso

About This Poem

Style/Type: Structured: Western

Review Request Direction: What did you think of my title?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?

Review Request Intensity: I appreciate moderate constructive criticism

Editing Stage: Not actively editing

About the Author

Region, Country: New England, originally, now, Macon, N.C., USA

Favorite Poets: Poe, Frost, Bob Dylan

More from this author

Comments

Geezer

Geezer

9 years 10 months ago

Oh, the portents...

we can ignore, when it pleases us! Second sight is not always a good thing! ~ Gee

L

Lonnie

9 years 10 months ago

Thanks Gee,

For the read, the review, and most of all for recuing me from the undiscovered list!

Sparrow

Sparrow

9 years 10 months ago

Lonnie

As usual a great write coiled inside where the struggle gets to grip with the world that has become old as a stale loaf of bread, things crumble yet we have to live.
Look outside and watch the simple things you have given the world, a string of words a talk to a stranger and their memory of what you said and thought goes on for ever so that we can re build our frame around a true Spirit.
Whoops someone tapped the keys while I watched.
Loved the write, Talk to you later, Yours Ian..

L

Lonnie

9 years 10 months ago

Thank you Ian,

A good, honest review, as is your won, and some generous comments thrown in also. Your time and effort is greatly appreciated as always!

Esker

Esker

9 years 10 months ago

awesome Lonnie!!

those juicy rats...knocking over pics..magazines...your jungle hole!
ha ha...and in the inner city.....here they are winter summer spring..
always the ever present pet...

Great Poem Sir!
thank U
mr esker!

L

Lonnie

9 years 10 months ago

Thanks Stephen,

I am always honored by a review from you and it is most appreciated!

wesley snow

wesley snow

9 years 10 months ago

You make me nuts!

I spend copious amounts of energy in workshop and critique telling people that punctuation matters. Punctuation is a tool of the poet... use all the tools you have. Punctuation clarifies as its absence usually causes confusion.

And then you write another poem and all my efforts are wasted.

Beautiful poem... and it needed no punctuation.

L

Lonnie

9 years 10 months ago

Thanks Wes,

and I'm sorry if I screwed up punctuation wise. I thought I used it where it seemed necessay, but maybe I didn't. anyways, I appreciate the read and the review!

Roscoe Lane

Roscoe Lane

9 years 10 months ago

Flows off,

Flows off the tongue, giving the mind a feast of imagery. Great work, Regards Roscoe...

L

Lonnie

9 years 10 months ago

Thanks Roscoe,

I'm happy you enjoyed the read and thankful for your kind words!

wesley snow

wesley snow

9 years 10 months ago

No.

You misunderstand. You used no punctuation and the poem read beautifully. You proved punctuation was/is unnecessary (but hard to do... I mean not for you of course, but for the rest of us mortals... well).