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This poem is part of the challenge:

Neopoet Challenge Contest # 15

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My Mother

In whom I spent my old days and nights,
Who rocked me in my cradle;
And fed my pretty mouth with a spoon,
Did weep while I should weep.
How much will I pay
For the pain you’ve taken for me?

Who worked that jumper to keep me warm;
Treated me with diffidence and respect,
Her healthy arms always be my stay,
And always admired my prudent face that filled with laughter.
How much will I pay
For the pains you’ve taken for me?

Who tired me with apology for being tiresome,
And asked twenty questions and never waited for an answer.
My timidity struck her at the first sight;
When she taught me to expect something extraordinary.
How much will I pay
For the pains you’ve taken for me?

I find such a pleasure
In obeying her commands,
That I take care to observe;
Shall soon come to bless me.
How much will I pay
For the pains you’ve taken for me?

I vow, I thought so;
Never, as among queens and princesses
In her age; to be explicit,
I’ve kept very little company
In pretty smooth dialogues with her.
How much will I pay
For the pains you’ve taken for me?

About This Poem

Style/Type: Free verse

Review Request Direction: What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?

Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back

Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft

About the Author

Region, Country: Osun State, Nigeria, NGA

Favorite Poets: William Wordsworth, Niyi Osundare, Wole Soyinka, J.P Clack

More from this author

Comments

Candlewitch

Candlewitch

3 years 1 month ago

hello, nice to meet you!

I really liked these lines:

I find such a pleasure
In obeying her commands,
That I take care to observe;
Shall soon come to bless me.
How much will I pay
For the pains you’ve taken for me?

welcome to Neopoet. if you should need any help, or have questions, just ask. I will help you if I can, if I can't help, then we will find someone who can.

*hugs, Cat

Candlewitch

Candlewitch

3 years 1 month ago

thank you!

not only are you kind too, but you are courteous, I really appreciate that a lot!

*hugs, Cat