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Sep 03, 2011
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My time is not up yet
In the frolic of
folly i amaze
into metaphorical mystery
i gaze.
Stark naked eyes
unknowing
the blank.
A mysery self-wrought
in the brooks
and
woods walked.
Then the last breath
shall surge
half in half out.
My soul if i have one
may submerge
In the glorification
of time
I thought
was once only mine..
About This Poem
Style/Type: Free verse
Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft
Comments
weirdelf
14 years 1 month ago
You are getting better and better.
my only crit is the line-
of dare i say
I think is un-necessary. Can you explain to me why it is there?
Love the poem.
Geremia
14 years 1 month ago
I agree with Jess Joe
I agree with Jess
Joe
loved
14 years 1 month ago
and i agree with you both ....thanks
Its so nice to hear comforting words
thanks again all ur good wishes
Roscoe Lane
14 years 1 month ago
Maybe,
Maybe your time has just begaun, nice poem. Regards Roscoe...
loved
14 years 1 month ago
thanks
for this as well as msg pm