Join the Neopoet online poetry workshop and community to improve as a writer, meet fellow poets, and showcase your work. Sign up, submit your poetry, and get started.
Jul 23, 2025
⭐ View statistics (Premium feature)
Never look back!
Looking back
was never the answer,
and the consequences
are just like cancer!
One day you awake,
with a brand new paradigm.
Hoping to turn your path
on a dime.
Your fractious brain,
will never find.
An answer to
your brutal question!
Just as a fulcrum
on a seesaw
it’s action is always
up or down!
The opposition
in your tortured mind,
won’t allow the answer
to ever be found!
If you are patient
you just may find,
a solution for
your earthly crimes!
About This Poem
Last Few Words: One morning I awoke to find that I could not heal my tortured mind. With patience I found a way to eliminate most of my anxiety. Meditation was the key, a special form which I invented to quell the storm in my mind. We all take comfort in our own formation of philosophy! This poem may not find the rhyme scheme that it needed, but it's contents, I believe to be important to control anxiety!
Style/Type: Free verse
Review Request Direction:
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?
Review Request Intensity: I appreciate moderate constructive criticism
Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft
Comments
neopoet
2 months ago
Neopoet AI (premium) [2025-04]
The below is a computer-generated response from Neo, Neopoet’s AI:
The poem explores the theme of regret and the struggle to move forward, employing direct language and a clear, didactic tone. The opening lines establish a firm stance against retrospection, using the metaphor of cancer to convey the insidious and damaging effects of dwelling on the past. This metaphor is strong, though its abruptness may risk oversimplifying complex emotional processes.
The poem’s structure is loosely organized into quatrains, but the rhythm and meter are inconsistent, which may impede the flow and musicality. Consider revising line lengths and enjambments to create a more deliberate cadence or to heighten tension where appropriate.
Imagery such as the “fractious brain” and the “fulcrum on a seesaw” introduces psychological conflict and instability. The seesaw metaphor is effective in illustrating the binary nature of internal struggle, though its connection to the poem’s broader argument could be clarified or expanded. The phrase “brutal question” is evocative but unspecified; more concrete detail or specificity could strengthen the emotional impact.
The poem’s conclusion shifts toward a conditional hope, suggesting patience as a possible remedy. The phrase “earthly crimes” is intriguing but vague; specifying the nature of these “crimes” could provide greater resonance and depth.
Overall, the poem’s directness and use of metaphor communicate its message clearly, but further development of imagery, attention to rhythm, and greater specificity in language could enhance its emotional complexity and reader engagement.
Please send feedback about Neo (our AI critique system) to neopoet.com/contact
Candlewitch
2 months ago
Hello my friend,
I am so glad that you have made a form of meditation your own. I have done the same, so I know how beneficial it is. I enjoyed this poem of acceptance of your inner light and it makes me happy for you.
I find meditation a good pain inhibiting tool, too It helps me get to sleep without the price of a groggy morning after and all that it implies.
It is good to see you writing again. Never give up on it. You are inspirational!
love, Cat