Triskelion

Jan 08, 2023 ⭐ View statistics (Premium feature)

OCH! (for Obi)

I cannae believe it
Just look at THAT!
There's blood in the cludgie
Where I just shat.

Och! boggin hell!
What stench! I swoon
I ken I'm fell
n' dyin' soon

It stappit me rump
It maimed me hole
That bloody clump
Half-filled the bowl

Good-bye cruel world!
I bet you'll laugh
When these pipes skirl
My epitaph!

About This Poem

Last Few Words: I was going to tack this onto the replies for the poem by Obadiah Grey "as of late", but hope he gets the inside joke, too. Cheers Obi! Thomas

Review Request Direction: How was my language use?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?

Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back

Editing Stage: Editing - polished draft

About the Author

Country/Region: Lake Simcoe Canada

Favorite Poets: Poe, Frost, E.B. Browning, Theodor Seuss Geisel,

Comments

Candlewitch

2 years 6 months ago

hello Thomas,

I am sure he will get a big kick from reading this! (I know I did!)

*hugs, Cat

Obadiah Grey

2 years 6 months ago

Rabbi Burns would be proud of

Rabbi Burns would be proud of ye, Thomas.
And move over McGonagall there's a new guy in town !!

Oh god bless ya, your little ditty gave me a belly laugh and that was much appreciated.

"Poetic poultice fer a bleedin arse."

Take this salve-
this balm-
this unction,
apply 'round valve
and up yer junction.

refrigerate and best
kept cool to thicken
up bloody water stool.
please don't fret
and do not fear

'tis but poetic -
Diarrhea !

Cheers, Thomas....... Obi.

Seren

2 years 6 months ago

Dear Triskelion

I really love this one!! I cannae change a word ;)

Nice to meet you

Sincerely Jayne x

Triskelion

2 years 6 months ago

Thanks guys

Is it just me, or is this site being over-run with AI bots and cricket poets?

Thomas

Obadiah Grey

2 years 6 months ago

cricket poets??????Obi.

"cricket poets", is that reference to rhyming couplets ??

Obi.

Triskelion

2 years 6 months ago

Lol

Sometimes, when you comment on a poem, all you get back is "crickets". Makes me think it's just a BOT submitting the work....like the emails you get that you can't respond to.

Thomas

Ruby Lord

2 years 3 months ago

This is a thought proking ditty, possibly to be used while sitting on the bog. I'm sure timing is everything, and if possible maybe a rat a tat tat bullet reign on release would compliment the rhyming structure, no end :)

Triskelion

2 years 2 months ago

Hi Ruby

Thanks for reading and your comment. All just in pure fun!

Thomas