c lynn brooks

Jul 14, 2020 ⭐ View statistics (Premium feature)

Open House Madness( deicated to Geezer's KILLER LOL)

Welcome!
Come step into my dream
I'm sure you will find
things are not what they seem

Your host is in the kitchen
he has become the main course
the places that are dined on
are his pleasures source

Now what is going on over there?
how many people can fit in one chair?
arms legs assorted body parts
hard to tell where one ends
and one starts

Baby kisses
from neck to spine
linger,linger please take your time
You say it's ok dear
just go along

Ardor and emotions
out of sync with time
when I awaken
what will I find

About This Poem

Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back

Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft

About the Author

Region, Country: north carolina usa, USA

Favorite Poets: Leonard Cohen, Edgar Alan Poe, ray Bradbury, John Grissom, .Alan S Jeeves James patterson,

This user supports Neopoet so it can be free to all

Comments

c lynn brooks

4 years 12 months ago

teddy

thank you lol I guess you are all set then

Gracy

4 years 12 months ago

Dear lynn, funny poem. Great

Dear lynn, funny poem. Great title. Not altogether sure of your meaning, perhaps others will understand it better than me. I'll return later. All the best, Gracy

c lynn brooks

4 years 12 months ago

Gracy

Just a strange dream I had and thought it an appropriate Killer poem

Lavender

4 years 12 months ago

Open House Madness

Hi, Chrys,
This is quite the open house - I love your first line! I really do wonder what you will find when you awaken...creepy fun!
Thank you!
L

c lynn brooks

4 years 12 months ago

lavender

lol glad you had fun ready this to answer you question all was quite and calm as it always is when I woke up

Geezer

4 years 12 months ago

I love it...

We are flattered beyond belief.
I'm hesitant about trying to adjust anything in this one.
But, I think that it could use a bit.
If I may; without sounding ungrateful...

Here is my version:

Welcome!
Come step into my dream
I'm sure that you will find
things are not what they seem

Your host is in the kitchen
he has become the main course
The places that are dined in
are his pleasure's source

Now what is going on there?
How many people can fit in a chair?
Arms and legs, assorted body parts
hard to tell where one ends
and where another starts

Baby kisses
from neck to spine
linger, linger please take your time
you say it's okay dear
just go along

Ardor and emotions
out of sync with time
When I awaken
what will I find?

c lynn brooks

4 years 12 months ago

Gee

thanks I'm glad Killer approves lol
I used the word "on" to add to the confusion of the whole thing
if you suggested any other changes I do not see them

raj

4 years 12 months ago

Hi Chrys

It was good to read this one...had fun reading it..

Be well..

c lynn brooks

4 years 12 months ago

raj

thanks much glad you enjoyed it