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Feb 11, 2015
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open my door--------------uf dated
Open the door
Remind me ere it’s too late
Who will this task for me undertake?
life is not yet at stake
which door will open
after does the main gate
I don't want to be late
where is in any case
that gate
where doors remain open all day all night
this door is like an open well
enter in and no one will tell
who came in
the door will record all your snaps
taken within
so close the door behind
ere in stark nudity you are caught
the one who you always had in mind
which door is that
I have yet to find
but friends I still have one in mind
this is just a sparring kind
at door opening
which is embedded
deep in my mind
About This Poem
Style/Type: Free verse
Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft
Comments
judyanne
10 years 5 months ago
is this for the contest Loved?
If so, perhaps you should depict it as such in the title
I think it is a good entry, but needs ridding of just a tad of waffle to make it clearer
Off you go now, and clean it up - you know how
Love judy
xxx
lovedly
10 years 5 months ago
THAnks
this is RE//HEAR//sal /ONLY
judyanne
10 years 5 months ago
re-HEAR-sal xxx
re-HEAR-sal
xxx
lovedly
10 years 5 months ago
yes
first i too was making
RE as re
will get it some day
may be //CAUSE//of DEAF//ness //ONE // may //SAY
got /IT//HURRAY!
Sparrow
10 years 5 months ago
Loved
The right door will open as you approach it, but realise that all these doors are just something for you to have as they are part of your thoughts here,
There are no doors it is a smooth transition to a beautiful change in state.
To actually have a door there I suppose I could be at the door for you, to show you around.
It will take some getting use to, lol, but we will go easy with you, Yours Ian..
lovedly
10 years 5 months ago
and WHY so?
....'''''but we will go easy with you??????
Sparrow
10 years 5 months ago
loved
Because you may be confused at being there LOL, Yours Ian !!
lovedly
10 years 5 months ago
hahahahaaa
confused at which door to open
when and where
all my doors remain open
every day
every where
alas which door do you mean?
do with me share
as one door alone is the most
which I care
but cannot share ..
so you all take care
beware
as I like everyone else
won't that door share