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This poem is part of the contest:

Neopoem Of The Week March 5th to March 11th 2023

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Pathway to the Pleiades

I have chosen
to go walkabout
without destiny
nor with doubt

Through a recanting of earth
I'll pass through many veils
finding the greater magic
is a touchstone of the grails

Along the misty road
I'll travel without fear
picking up vibrations
I'm an elfen pioneer

Gossamer filbrils of light
softly drift round my head
as I walk among the stars
I'm dazzled as they dispread

I am watching as my skin
Seems to shimmer from within,
Seeing the truth revealed
my soul is enamelled sans sin

Alighting from the orbs
I finally float to ground
I discovered a hidden path
leading to the profound

As I gently close my eyes
I follow a song in my soul
and crossing the Eovly fault
my body loses all control

Like a magnificent supernova
that has suddenly reached its end
I'm now exploding into the void
my spirit reached it's final transcend

A billion heavenly bodies
now shine in the evening skies
there among them hiding
I'm now a smiling demiguise

About This Poem

Style/Type: Structured: Western

Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back

Editing Stage: Editing - draft

About the Author

Region, Country: Beyond the Black Stump..Australia, AUS

Favorite Poets: Pablo Neruda, P.K.Page, W.H.Auden, to many and various to include them all ...

More from this author

Comments

Seren

Seren

2 years 3 months ago

Thank you!. I can't read if I

Thank you!. I can't read if I haven't been here. I had a family emergency halfway across the state to attend to, 8hrs away from here. I'll get around to reading some of your new poems.

Smiles Love Sis xxx

Geezer

Geezer

2 years 3 months ago

I thought that...

you could have done better
with your title. This poem deserves a great title.
Your walk among the stars and constellations needs
a grander sign to attract the reader. I mean...
"Hiding in Disguise"? Of course, if you are in hiding
you would use a disguise. How about something like:

Pathway in the Stars? or Walkabout in the Pleiades?
Pathway in the Pleiades!

I found no fault with anything else.
A trip of extraordinary beauty amongst the constellations.

~ Geez.
.

Seren

Seren

2 years 3 months ago

Hmm what about. The Grail in

Hmm what about. The Grail in the Heavens (or stars)??..

This one wrote itself. And there is one word in there that I made up myself and it's from the thing in December. Eovly. I made it up for something else.

I'm so happy you liked it

Love Sis xxx

Edit:- I Changed the title to one you suggested I took
a shine to it.

Geezer

Geezer

2 years 3 months ago

So glad...

that I could help. This may be the one that will take the contest! ~ Love and higgest bugs, ~ Geez.
.

Seren

Seren

2 years 3 months ago

I actually wasn't sure what

I actually wasn't sure what to call it and just put the original title just so it had one lol.

I appreciate the help I'm really happy you liked it.

Love and higgliest bugs Sis xox

S

scribbler

2 years 3 months ago

OK

Eovly.....an interesting made up word but what does it mean?That aside this is an interesting poem.

RoseBlack

RoseBlack

2 years 3 months ago

This is just

lovely! I love the part of transcending from the orbs! You are truly a master at writing fantasy/fairy tale like poetry. Your choice of words is always elegant and flow so easily. Love this!

Seren

Seren

2 years 3 months ago

Dear Carrie

Thanks so much I am really glad you enjoyed it, fantasy is what I do and create.

i appreciate the read and the lovely compliment.

love and big hugs Jayne xxx

Jackweb

Jackweb

2 years 3 months ago

I will only...

compliment your good writing skill. I love your writing voice because it's engaging and approachable. Very good stuff here.
.

Seren

Seren

2 years 3 months ago

Dear Jack

Thanks so much for your kind comment, it's really appreciated.

Also, thanks for the visit.

Kind Regards Seren

Seren

Seren

2 years 3 months ago

Both

You should've put money on it lol

Hugs Jayne

Geezer

Geezer

2 years 3 months ago

Found...

another typo! [loses].~ Higgest bugs, ~ Bro.
.