Piety

The clock out of the universe
Keeps me mediating
Like the ascending and descending of man
The agreed hour shall come
When the unvisitable moment is scheduled
And the frozen breath will be our victory.

As wavy as green plants
So do beings wagging and lagging
Unforgettable we must all know
From dust we arose to it we return
Power strivers are like hovers
Viciously we are grim reapers.

Questions
When the Psychopomps comes to accompany
what piety is ours?
Which kingdom is to embrace
When the deeds are dirty
Heaven or hell?

About This Poem

Review Request Direction: What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?

Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back

Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft