raj

Nov 18, 2018 ⭐ View statistics (Premium feature)

The Poems I Love

The poems I love, are
those which give me wings.
The words become landscapes
for me to soar and glide.

The poems I love, are
those who take me in the now.
Where I can feel the atoms
spinning around

The poems I love; are
which resonate the notes.
Strumming my heartstrings,
like a sitar

The poems I love, are
not just static words.
They keep on returning
like homing birds.

About This Poem

Last Few Words: This poem is written also to embed some "implied imagery" a topic on which Stan is currently running a workshop. The Title is inspired by the recent Blog of IRiz

Style/Type: Free verse

Review Request Direction: How was the beginning/ending of the poem?

Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back

Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft

About the Author

Region, Country: Somewhere in the world, IND

Comments

IRiz

6 years 7 months ago

Thanks IRiz for your encouraging words...as mentioned in the Last few words the subject of your Blog inspired me to write this one..
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IRiz

6 years 7 months ago

I know, you are inspired by

Raj,
One more line to rephrase perhaps?

Where they feed my soul
with rain or sunshine.

Rain and sunshine are very common images and do not add to the meaning, it looks like you simply mean that the poems feed you.
Consider maybe more specific image, like poems quench your thirst or feed your unquenchable need for passion, or replace your regular meal, whatever you think of just make your line more alive.
If this is okay I will prepare it for Instagram whenever it is ready.

raj

6 years 7 months ago

Thanks IRiz

for coming back to this poem and your suggestion which is appreciated....I will definitely work on that line..once done will let you know so that you can comment again. on the change...

thanks again...

PS: I have made changes. Please review when you find and let me know if they work better than before..
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IRiz

6 years 7 months ago

I love the poem.

Take me into Now
Make me feel every atom
Spinning around?

No just kidding.

raj

6 years 7 months ago

did you find the change to be

did you find the change to be good?
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IRiz

6 years 7 months ago

Yes I think, it is better.

Yes I think, it is better.
It says what you mean.

raj

6 years 7 months ago

Is this better?

The poems I like, are
those who take me in the now.
Where I can feel it all
spinning around
................................................

IRiz

6 years 7 months ago

Maybe, what do you think?

Maybe, what do you think?
You have to decide.

raj

6 years 7 months ago

Hi IRis.

actually I made a small edit just now. This is good to go on Instagram. Good to know you find this poem worthy to go on Instagram. Has Neopoet's Instagram become active? Where to find it on the site?
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raj

6 years 7 months ago

Will you please make the

Will you please make the small changes I have made, on the Instagram page?
.................................

IRiz

6 years 7 months ago

When you said that you are

When you said that you are done editing I used a fragment of your poem to make an image.
Now I have to delete it and replace with the new.
How about i will make a new post instead?
Later I can delete this one if you want. No problem.
For images like that there is no edditing possible only deleting. This one has a lot of likes I would keep it for awhile. It looks good.

raj

6 years 7 months ago

IRiz, your idea seems good to

IRiz, your idea seems good to me....i didn't know that there is no edit option...you may repost and later on delete the existing....sorry for the trouble...
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