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D

Psapfo 312

The intense longing
Of a dead man
For his beloved

That naked lonely
Beauty

Who haunted
The lofty climbs of Leucadia

As much Afroditi
As Afroditi

Who gazed
On Adonis
With idolatry

About This Poem

Review Request Direction: What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?

Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back

Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft

About the Author

Country/Region: The Celestial River

Favorite Poets: Shane MacGowan, Dylan Thomas, Qays ibn Al-Mulawwah, Wallada bint al-Mustakfi, Rumi, Khalil Gibran, Yona Wallach, Arthur Rimbaud, Paul Eluard, Brendan Behan, James Clarence Mangan, William Blake, Tom Waits, Charles Bukowski, Forough Farrokhzad, Thomas Chatterton

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neopoet

neopoet

5 months 2 weeks ago

Neopoet AI 5-29-23 version

The below is a computer-generated response from Neo, Neopoet's computer artificial intelligence:

The poem "Psapfo 312" evokes a sense of longing and beauty through its imagery and references to Greek mythology. The repetition of "Afroditi" and the comparison to Adonis create a strong thematic connection to love and desire. However, there are areas where the poem could be strengthened. Consider providing more specific details or sensory descriptions to enhance the reader's connection to the emotions being conveyed. Additionally, ensuring consistency in punctuation and line breaks can help improve the flow and impact of the poem. Overall, expanding on the vivid imagery and refining the structure could further elevate the poem's evocative power.

Please send feedback about Neo (our computer generated critique system) to https://www.neopoet.com/contact