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Psychologically wound tight as a winch

Hester Prynne silently bore punishment
decreed courtesy strict
Puritan magistrates
and town fathers of Boston
that Hester Prynne
must wear the scarlet letter "A"
(a book with the same title
courtesy Nathaniel Hawthorne)
prominently displayed
on the breast of her gown,
specifically over her heart
for adultery and begetting
a child out of wedlock
in 17th-century
Puritan Massachusetts setting,
decreed she must be required
to wear symbol of shame
on her clothing,
upon her bosom and psyche,
did said capital offense pinch,
which she herself famously
embroidered with gold thread,
yet methinks the father
(of the "Kitchy coo" -
often spelled kootchy-koo
or gitchy-goo coo -
an affectionate, nonsensical phrase
used as "baby talk" or "motherese"
to amuse, soothe,
or tickle babies
and young) innocent child
got off scott free,
and maybe twas perhaps
upon his domination,
and aggressive insistence
similar to the coerced,
forced, and inforced
non consensual intercourse
that begat nine months later,
our second of two daughters,
cuz yours truly started
to pout like the grinch
if sexual overtures
gently snubbed by spouse
and doth automatically flinch,
not only aversion,
and animus toward self now,
(twenty seven plus years later)
for being so pushy
and squishy with willy,
nevertheless when the wife musses
with my longish and wavy hair,
when she playfully doth cinch
into a ponytail these
silvered brown shy locks
(streaked with gray),
which habitual retraction away
from hand(s) of spouse,
when she doth fiddle
and jig with me hair,
(finding me fretfully bowed over),
or if spouse lightly
drums atop me noggin
(giving me a knick knack paddywhack..)
which harmless antics
analogous to a hair trigger
harkens back to mine earlier days of yore
rather foremost behavioral trait
throughout mein kampf
when I vividly remember,
father of mine ofttimes
made spontaneous but futile attempts
to reach out and touch yours truly,
not in any threatening manner,
but merely to express
non verbal affection
for his singular son,
who lapsed into boyhood interrupted
on the cusp of adolescence,
and in fact off told
and recounted by either parent,
clear as that Tuesday January thirteenth
nineteen hundred and fifty nine
characterized by drizzle and fog,
the day he (the writer of these words)
got born free and clear
when their second of three progeny
and only male offspring
(scores of decades ago)
that nobody but mommy
could pamper, coddle, cosset,
spoil, indulge, baby and mollycoddle me
whereat yours truly suckled at the breast
particularly during my infancy
and in later years
estranged himself from
those two adults who contributed
to his existence.

Somehow at a tender age
being heavily endowed
with being gifted
with hirsute characteristic
sprouting from mine numb skull
at least during the winter months
living as a wild, where survival
linkedin to ability to forage
for lichen to non poisonous plants,
small game, berries
and hence must possess
broad botanical knowledge
and often resort to a page
from a playbooks about edible herbs –
that witnessed considerable usage
and adopt the appellation zage
not a standard English word,
but appears as a name
(Slavic/Hebrew for strength),
a surname (German/Slovenian origin),
or a typo for "zag" (a sharp turn)
or German "zagen" (to hesitate/fear),
and can also relate
to Amharic (corrode)
or Hausa (abuse) in specific contexts,
but most often points to names
or related words like zagging
(moving in zigzags), zagen
(hesitate), or the footballer Zague,
often spotted as the wild man of Borneo
my completing a trio
where a long deceased forebear
though a man of ordinary height
and often referred primarily to themselves
as a famous 19th-century sideshow act
featuring two strong,
short-statured dwarf brothers,
Waino (Hiram) and Plutanor (Barney),
promoted as exotic jungle natives,
and secondarily to orangutans,
whose Malay name means
“person of the forest,”
with thick matted hair
covering the majority
of my scrawny body
when born, and not surprisingly
called little monkey
courtesy my mother.

About This Poem

Last Few Words: my humble apology for flagrantly submitting my entry(ies) for contests without adhering to the specifications, which oversight earned me a couple of well deserved rebukes now cherishing the privilege to post.

Style/Type: Free verse

Review Request Direction: What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?

Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back

Editing Stage: Editing - polished draft

About the Author

Region, Country: PA, USA

Favorite Poets: Robert Burns, Charles Dickens, Robert Frost, Matthew Scott Harris, Henry Wadsworth Longfellow, Sylvia Plath, Gary Snyder, Henry David Thoreau, Walt Whitman

More from this author

Comments

neopoet

neopoet

3 months 3 weeks ago

Neopoet AI [2025-04]

The below is a computer-generated response from Neo, Neopoet’s AI:

This poem ambitiously intertwines personal history, literary allusion, and introspective reflection, creating a tapestry that spans from 17th-century Puritan Boston to intimate familial memories. The invocation of Hester Prynne and the scarlet letter as a framing device is effective in setting a tone of psychological burden and societal judgment, which then segues into the speaker’s own experiences with vulnerability and familial dynamics.

Strengths: - The poem’s scope is wide and rich, blending historical context with personal narrative, which invites readers to consider the lingering effects of shame, identity, and interpersonal relationships across time. - The use of varied diction—from archaic (“methinks,” “doth”) to colloquial (“kootchy-koo,” “grinch”)—adds texture and voice, reflecting the complexity of the speaker’s psyche. - The imagery related to hair and touch is evocative and serves as a recurring motif symbolizing connection, resistance, and memory.

Areas for development: 1. **Structural coherence and pacing:** The poem’s length and dense, meandering syntax can challenge reader engagement. Consider breaking the poem into stanzas or sections to create natural pauses and clarify shifts between historical reflection, personal anecdote, and linguistic exploration. This would help readers navigate the poem’s thematic layers more smoothly.

2. **Clarity and focus:** Some passages, such as the extended etymological digression on “zage,” while intellectually interesting, risk disrupting the emotional flow. Reflect on whether these details serve the poem’s central themes or could be streamlined to maintain momentum.

3. **Tone consistency:** The poem oscillates between formal, archaic phrasing and casual, humorous asides. While this can be a deliberate stylistic choice, ensuring these shifts feel purposeful rather than jarring will strengthen the poem’s voice.

4. **Imagery and metaphor development:** The poem introduces compelling images (scarlet letter, hair as a site of affection and anxiety, “wild man of Borneo”) but could deepen their resonance by connecting them more explicitly to the poem’s emotional core. For example, expanding on how the “scarlet letter” metaphor parallels the speaker’s own psychological wounds could unify the poem’s disparate elements.

5. **Line breaks and punctuation:** The poem’s current form is mostly a block of text with minimal punctuation, which can obscure meaning and rhythm. Experimenting with line breaks, enjambment, and punctuation could enhance readability and emphasize key moments or shifts in tone.

Overall, the poem’s ambition and thematic richness are commendable. With focused revision on structure, clarity, and voice, it can more powerfully convey the intricate interplay between inherited shame, personal history, and the complexities of familial love and trauma.

Please send feedback about Neo (our AI critique system) to neopoet.com/contact