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Jun 30, 2022
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Rainbow rhapsody
If you could hear colours
And if you could see sounds
You would hear the rainbow
And see how my heart pounds
Each time that our eyes meet
And as I hear your voice
A colourful musical harmony
Erupts without a choice
Blue into yellow
Yellow to red
Creating warmth in my heart
And hope in my head
You brought my colours back
my soul No longer black
see the beauty from my song
all the others saw it wrong.
About This Poem
Editing Stage: Not actively editing
Comments
Rosewood Apothecary
2 years 12 months ago
My style
Good meter. Good title. I like the subject matter. It’s a nice complete thought. Well composed. I like lovey stuff!
Tim
Candlewitch
2 years 12 months ago
as Tim said...
all of that and, I most like these lines:
You brought all my colours back
The depths of my soul No longer black
You see beauty from my spirit song
When all of the others just heard it wrong.
*hugs, Cat
Rosewood Apothecary
2 years 12 months ago
Great summation
Those lines end the poem so nicely!
Words.unwritten
2 years 12 months ago
Thanks Tim I really
Thanks Tim I really appreciate your comments x x
Words.unwritten
2 years 12 months ago
Thanks cat x x
Thanks cat x x
Words.unwritten
2 years 12 months ago
Thanks guys x x x
Thanks guys x x x
Words.unwritten
2 years 12 months ago
Thanks lol ...that is an
Thanks lol ...that is an awesome thought
Rosewood Apothecary
2 years 12 months ago
I am a musician/producer
I’d be willing to give it a try. There are links to the music I write and record on my profile.
Words.unwritten
2 years 12 months ago
That would be so cool..
That would be so cool...please do x
Geezer
2 years 12 months ago
I love this!...
I love this!...
I do believe that your intention was for the lines to say:
"If you could [hear]colors
and you could [see] sounds
You would hear the rainbow
and see my heart pound - I changed the line just a bit to make the rhythm
. just a tad smoother.
I would delete the word [musical] making it:
"A colorful harmoney
erupts without choice"
You brought my colors back
My soul no longer back
See the beauty of my song
All the others saw it wrong
Of course, as always, it is your work and you can do it as you like. ~ Geezer.
.
Words.unwritten
2 years 12 months ago
Also ...I've made the changes
Also ...I've made the changes as they do make it flow better and make slightly more sense I think x
Words.unwritten
2 years 12 months ago
Yes lol....that was my
Yes lol....that was my intention and I can't believe I wrote that the wrong way round lol ...thanks for noticing x x
Rosewood Apothecary
2 years 12 months ago
I got this
This is gonna be cool. What do you want for splits when it hits Spotify. We get like $.00003 per stream. Lol! But seriously though piano power ballad.
Tim
Words.unwritten
2 years 12 months ago
50 50 split lol ...I can't
50 50 split lol ...I can't wait to hear it xx
Il send you my email later x x xao cool
Rosewood Apothecary
2 years 12 months ago
I got something
Yeah I wrote some music.