Rosewood Apothecary

May 10, 2023 ⭐ View statistics (Premium feature)

Return to the Limelight

With excitement building
I sit down to rehearse
Better everyday
Could always play it worse

I asked for a booking
Which I then received
Now I’ve got to work
Although my soul’s relieved

Make it my routine
Like the decades past
Focus on the performance
Until the very last

Final note sustains
I come back to myself
Return from sonic journeys
With treasure chests of wealth

About This Poem

Style/Type: Structured: Western

Review Request Direction: How does this theme appeal to you?

Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back

Editing Stage: Editing - polished draft

About the Author

Region, Country: U.S.A., USA

Favorite Poets: Emily Dickinson, Robert Frost, Walt Whitman. I’m enamored by the work of lyricists such as Robert Hunter, John Barlow, John Dyer Baizley, and Tom Marshall just to name a handful.

Comments

Ruby Lord

2 years 2 months ago

Beautiful, the build up was

Beautiful, the build up was good and I enjoyed the rhyme and rhythm of the poem. Ruby :)

Geezer

2 years 2 months ago

I like this one, but you have a little bumble or two
Normally, I am all about the minimum lines, but I think you might have overdone it a little.
I would like to have seen it go a little bit more in some lines.

Example:
With excitement building
I sit down to rehearse
it's better everyday
I could always play it worse

I've been asking for a booking
which I've now received
Now, I'm going to work
and my soul's relieved

Of course you know, you can chuck my advice in the outgoing file under your desk? ~ Geez.
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Rosewood Apothecary

2 years 2 months ago

I get what your driving at

I think leaving some things implied here makes it seem a bit manic which is sort of how I’ve been feeling lately. As far as “I’ve been asking for a booking”; that is actually an entirely false statement. I asked one time and the response I got from the promoter was basically “yes you can get a booking, everyone has been asking and waiting, what do you need to make your return to the stage epic as fuck?” I am proud as hell of this as it is the product of the relationships I worked on in this business for 20 years.

I hadn’t thought about performing at all since the band broke up. I like a collaborative ensemble. I’ve tried to put something together to start up again but it’s just not happening. So, I started thinking about what I could do that sounds good all by myself, after all, Sapphire worked well with no drums and very little accompaniment save that Cello that comes in about halfway. That is probably what got me thinking now that you mention it.

This one is deeper than I realized when I wrote it and it’s got me thinking about feelings and how opportunists don’t wait for things, they go get them. I’m not waiting anymore. Art is my life and hence my life is a work of art; about how all of our lives are works of art.

When this concert happens I’m going to try and have a streaming link. I need to enlist my dude Supe because he’s my spirit animal for like everything. My hope is that some of my distant friends might be able to listen. Hopefully I’ll be able to execute that plan.

I appreciate the critique immensely. It’s literally the highest compliment.

Tim

Geezer

2 years 2 months ago

Absolutely...

I have the utmost respect for you and your work. I would be pleased beyond measure to have access to a streaming link, if you can do it. As to critique, I always try my best to deliver what I think will help the author. If this is/was helpful in any way; that too, pleases me. Good luck with your project. I hope that it doesn't, mean that I will see less of your work. If I can help in any way, just shoot me a line, and I will do my best to be there for you. ~ Geez.
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Lavender

2 years 2 months ago