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TITLES here we go

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The Reward of Rancor (TITLE WS final edit)

Lying on my bed,
the silence
is too loud,
ringing
in my head

Anger fades
out of sight
but in my heart
a stubborn pride
resides

Rising restlessness
my mind aches
from solace denied
by the sting of
malice

My soul is
a cracked mirror,
a distorted
self reflection
of self-loathing ,
blooming in colour

The lost truce invites the rule
of despair
when harmony and tranquility
die side by side
giving birth to
this unbearable
silence.....

About This Poem

Style/Type: Free verse

Review Request Direction: What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?

Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back

Editing Stage: Editing - draft

About the Author

Region, Country: singapore, SGP

Favorite Poets: Emily Dickinson, Robert Frost, Sarojini Naidu and friends in Neopoet.

More from this author

Comments

S

scribbler

10 years 1 month ago

Hi Alid

An obvious title could be "Why Sleep Eludes"........stan

alidzain

alidzain

10 years 1 month ago

Hmm

Now that's a very different one from the original title, the one which you gave.. lol. Interesting.

Alid

S

scribbler

10 years 1 month ago

You are beginning to see

that there can be many more than one "right" title. But there can also be a lot of wrong ones too. The purpose of this shop is to merely get folks to put at least a modicum of thought into what they title their works.......stan

Rula

Rula

10 years 1 month ago

"Pain At Its Best"

Or
"Fighting Pain"
So difficult to suggest a title for someone else.

S

scribbler

10 years 1 month ago

yes it is

Reckon that's because it's not always possible to discern exactly what a writer is trying to convey and a good title gives at least a hint of that........stan

judyanne

judyanne

10 years 1 month ago

perhaps

the reward of rancor ??
the after-taste of bitterness ??

love judy
xxx

Rula

Rula

10 years 1 month ago

I like the title

though not sure how it fits. The word rancor is new for me.
Thank you. I thought it is always good to learn new diction.

S

scribbler

10 years 1 month ago

Very good

I puts the reader on the path you chose. In fact, hatred usually Does harm the hater more than the hated.........stan