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The Bottom Line

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Rula's dactyl tetrameter (Bottom Line WS)

Time isn't a thing that we borrow, but
it is about how you live the tomorrow and  
it is a life, an attempt that you go through so,
time is about what you thoroughly learn to do. 


Time isn't a| thing  that we| purchase or| bo-rrow, but
it is a-|bout how you| live the to|mo-rrow and  
it is a|life, an a-|ttempt, that you| go through so,
time is a-|bout what you| tho-ro-ughly| learn-to do 

About This Poem

Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft

About the Author

Region, Country: Jordan, JOR

Favorite Poets: I favor the ones who are closer to humanity and , Poets are humanity when the world lose it.

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Comments

Ian.T

Ian.T

12 years ago

Rula

Can you use " joyously hold on to" as a last two words in your piece, these word splitting is really like splitting hairs, I cant say I enjoy it one bit.
"time is about what you joyously hold on to"
Take care Yours Ian.T

Rula

Rula

12 years ago

I can't agree more

dear Ian. Spliting those words do split the hair.
I shall wait to see what other changes Wesley
would suggest or if he would let me go with
what I did.
I wonder where he is. Just hoping he's OK.

wesley snow

wesley snow

12 years ago

Late but here.

Last line, last foot:
I am less concerned with the catalectic foot than I am with you accenting the first syllable on "pursue". Naturally pronounced "pursue" is accented on the second syllable. Otherwise the quatrain is Dactyl.