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May 15, 2018
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Safe Place
I stay hidden away
From the unknown
Tucked beneath the covers
Where one thing is certain,
It’s dark.
About This Poem
Style/Type: Free verse
Review Request Direction:
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?
Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft
Comments
Rula
7 years 1 month ago
shot cut and to the point
thought T. Harmonee, but if this is true, don't stay there for long , just an advice.
T. Harmonee
7 years 1 month ago
Behind the poem
Just a poem inspired by a feeling I and everyone else naturally feels about things that are new.
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raj
7 years 1 month ago
Hi TH
I echo comment of Rula
I feel there is no place for "away" in line 1
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Eumolpus
7 years 1 month ago
yes to the point
and something you enjoy reading over several times. Has just the right amount of thought-fullness, humor, and irony. Nice!
tyro
7 years 1 month ago
a real little gem, so many
a real little gem, so many connotations flow from here