ziggy

Apr 02, 2011 ⭐ View statistics (Premium feature)

SAFFRON SPICE

a garden of saffron
irrigated parched land
flowers picked at dawn
before midday sun wither.

fresh spice exotic delight
purple petals cups its
essence till harvest picks
plucks its stigmas trice.

inhale its wealthy odour
pure indulgence
powered deep red
natures seasoned aroma.

shipped abroad
since wooden gallows
eastern promise
saffron spice.

About This Poem

Style/Type: Free verse

Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back

Editing Stage: Editing - draft

About the Author

Country/Region: IRL

Comments

ziggy

14 years 3 months ago

hello hello hello

yes the spice of life indeed lol
cheers shirl glad you stopped by
,,,,,,,,,,,,zigs x

lou

14 years 3 months ago

Zigs

I like this one, especially the first stanza, but stanza 1 line 2, i think should say parched. Stanza 2 line 2 should say cup,stanza 2 line 4 should say pluck I think.

Apart from that I think this a beautiful poem, my friend.

Love Louise xx

ziggy

14 years 3 months ago

hi louise

I will look at your suggestions, but I did look into
this before writing it, ,chat soon ,,,,,,,,,,and thank you
for the read ,,,,,,,zigs

Eduardo Cruz

14 years 3 months ago

z

I really liked this, especial this stanza,
"inhale its wealthy odour
pure indulgence
powered deep red
natures seasoned aroma"

Puerto Ricans are big on this spice seens the stone age.
great lines in this one!
Eddie

ziggy

14 years 3 months ago

hello again

cheers for the comment, I am glad you
enjoyed this one, that's a fav stanza of mine too
check your words out later on ,,,,,,thanks ,,,,,,zigs

Hooded Stranger

14 years 3 months ago

Zigs

Zigs,

as you know, I have read this one previously and gave you feedback and critique pre- Neo.

I still like this poem, a different subject for you my friend.

A good poem,

ziggy

14 years 3 months ago

hi hood

LOL yes I know what you mean this does not have
the ziggy feel to it lol, I was just trying to mix things up a
bit I guess and it was wrote from watching TV ,,,,,,,,,,,zigs

Candlewitch

14 years 3 months ago

Dear Ziggy,

Every line is perfection. But if I had to pick favorite lines, they would be:

shipped abroad
since wooden gallows
eastern promise
saffron spice.

This has a dreamy far away quality to it.
I'm so glad you have returned and I hope you found adventure in your travels. But it is soooo good to have you back!

love, Cat

ziggy

14 years 3 months ago

hi cat

I am delighted you approve cheers
I am a bit under the weather with a
head cold it just won't go away lol
Its nice to feel wanted cheers cat
,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,zigs x

Race_9togo

14 years 3 months ago

Ziggy

I like this one, the way it flows, the subtle taste of it reminding me of the flavor and aroma of that delicate and rich spice.

A few things...

I wanted to read "parched instead of "parch" in the first stanza, and I had problems understanding "before midday sun wither", before I finally read it as "before midday sun's wither".

In the second stanza, "picks" and plucks": if "picks" are pickers, should "plucks" reflect this, and be singular instead? Also, "trice"...did you mean "in a trice", or "thrice", as in three times?

In the last stanza, "gallows" threw me off, it's implications of death and execution seem incongruous in the context of the poem's atmosphere. Perhaps "galleons", or "galleys" instead?

Hope this helps.

ziggy

14 years 3 months ago

thanks for the interest I wrote this while looking at a documentary about exotic spice and it history trade routes
and how and when it is harvested, the land where is was grown was referred to as parch land in the documentary and showed how it was irrigated, when it is ready to be harvested the hot sun can wither the flower head so they are harvested early morning , hence that line, the picks/plucks were used as they pluck the petals
before removing the stigmas which is where the spice comes from as they have three of them and not the normal 1, gallows was used in reference to when and how long the spice has being sought after and shipped abroad cheers hope this helps ,,,,,,,zigs

vexations10

14 years 3 months ago

Interesting

I see you have had many suggestions, so I will say that I like the poem. I did have a concern about irrigated parch land. I wanted to read it as “parched irrigated land.” I also wonder if irrigated land is parched. Seems a contradiction to me but I am not expert in agriculture, especially irrigated land.

ziggy

14 years 3 months ago

hi there

hey there my reasoning behind this one was taken by watching a documentary about the theme
but I may have to concede to the 'parched' ,,,,,,,,this is not my usual theme its a bit to happy for me
to be honest lol cheers for the comment ,,,,,,,,,,,,,zigs