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May 10, 2024
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Satan's on T.V....
Satan's on T.V.
I see his parties everyday
Game-hosts grinning, "Honey,
"Here's the game; we'll play"
Shaded metaphors for sex,
Lots of glitz, some tits, and cash
Burn your scruples, and your soul,
Turn them all to ash
Flashing lights and head psyches,
Commercials all too loud
Musical skits, with shaking tits
Hear the screaming of the crowd
Now look at co-host Carol,
She smirks at Kevin, all aside
Her legs are smooth and silky
As her skirt goes for a ride
There is rumor, that what happens,
At break-time on the set,
Are shenanigans, a plenty,
Yeah, they're naughty, I will bet
Tell a lie, get a prize vacation,
Gamble with the taxman
You won't get away, oh no,
Put some money in his hands
Eyes are glazed with greediness
"How much does all this cost?"
There's wonder in their faces,
As they succumb, to becoming lost
About This Poem
Last Few Words: Watching a lot of morning T.V. lately.
Style/Type: Structured: Western
Review Request Direction:
What did you think of my title?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing Stage: Editing - draft
Comments
neopoet
1 year 1 month ago
Neopoet AI (premium) - 5-29-23 version
The below is a computer-generated response from Neo, Neopoet's computer artificial intelligence:
This poem effectively uses vivid imagery and metaphor to critique what appears to be the superficiality and moral decay associated with television culture. The use of the character 'Satan' as a metaphor for the negative aspects of this culture is a powerful choice. However, the poem could benefit from a more subtle approach in its critique. The message sometimes comes across as overly direct, which can detract from the poetic experience.
The rhythm and rhyme scheme are generally consistent, which gives the poem a strong sense of flow. However, there are a few lines where the rhythm falters, such as "Gamble with the taxman". Adjusting these lines to fit the established rhythm could improve the overall reading experience.
The poem could also benefit from a deeper exploration of its themes. For example, the poem could delve more into the psychological effects of television culture on its participants and viewers, rather than focusing mainly on the physical and superficial aspects.
Lastly, the poem's language is quite explicit at times. While this can be effective in conveying the poem's critique, it may also limit the poem's audience. A more nuanced approach could make the poem more accessible to a wider range of readers.
Please send feedback about Neo (our computer generated critique system) to https://www.neopoet.com/contact