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SEARCHING FOR BEAUTY
There's too much ugliness by far
in this day's society
murder by knife and gun or car
love and life spent recklessly
Drugs and corruption fill headlines
treason, rape, incest and worse
seeming to spread like kudzu vines
an infection with no cure
One must read far in the news
before there's any better views
yet even in the sporting pages
scandal sells the ink and paper
But if one looks around enough
in the world or even media
there can be found a bit of beauty
growing within the wasteland
For there are peace talks going on
(though not nearly enough)
and forests actually replanted
and fragile wonders set aside
in conservation tracts
Here and there a Don Quixote
still tilts at bureaucratic mills
and men of reason come together
in attempts to find the answers
fighting the good fight
against evils rampant
And flowers bloom
and life is born
even love finds time to flourish
mayhaps that perfect poem is being written
as you read this one which isn't
I opened up today's paper. On page 9 there was the story of another possible cure for a type of cancer. Up above the story was a picture of a bald headed little girl who had just become more beautiful having been given that best of medicines......HOPE
About This Poem
Last Few Words: This is an example of morphing poetry. In this instance it begins with rhyming western classic describing ugliness and slowly transforms to plain prose describing beauty. Let me know if you think this works or not as I'm still working on developing this morphing form..........stan PS don't be afraid to say you think it sucks
Style/Type: Free verse
Review Request Direction:
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft
Comments
Candlewitch
13 years 6 months ago
Dea Stan,
In this line:
growing within the wasreland
do you mean wasteland?
I really like this style of writing. I think you are on to something big.
ps
I hope that little girl will get the cure :)
always, Cat
scribbler
13 years 6 months ago
Hi Cat
I reckon it doesn't matterthat I review stuff before I post it as those cussed typos slip through anyway lol. I am glad you like this form and hope you will give it a rty also.............stan
weirdelf
13 years 6 months ago
Bit fucking ironic from the man who is co-leader if a workshop
called "Titles".
Got to laugh.
The poem, I see your morphing technique. I would suggest making a more gradual transition. eg you use rhyming couplets, the least sophisticated form in the 3rd stanza.
Content wise, it was trite man. The whole content could have been said as
"shit happens,
but so do good things"
scribbler
13 years 6 months ago
hello
Kinda expected to catch it for lack of title lol.Hoped to get more people involved by them suggesting one (a bit sneaky).3rd stanza has a morph within the stanza from rhyming couplet to blank verse. Do you think changes should only be from stanza to stanza? The way I see forms in order from rhyming to not is:
5 line rhyming(abbaa,aabba,ect), 4 line alternating rhyme(abab), 4line rhyming couplets(aabb), mixed(aBlank a Blank), blank verse, free verse( free verse also can use variables ranging from 4 line metered to random lined unmeterd) , poetic prose, plain prose.......still working of how to include Haiku, rhyku, concrete and maybe even acrostic and where the fit in........................stan