mark

Jun 25, 2017 ⭐ View statistics (Premium feature)

This poem is part of the workshop:

Season's Will (first poem)

https://soundcloud.com/user-992937220/seasond
~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Moments of joy she thought had left
Seemingly desire died in theft
With time to test her will to try
In season’s cold a lifetime wanders by

With spring so sure as swallows fly
With time in motion a lively sky
From a kindle deep inside heart’s churn
Moments of joy again return

With rain to wash as rivers fill
With trees to flower as blossoms thrill
Birds in chorus are seen at sill
All in all as season’s will

About This Poem

Style/Type: Structured: Western

Editing Stage: Editing - polished draft

About the Author

Region, Country: USA the bay state, United Kingdom, Australia, South Africa, Nigeria, Canada, Europe, USA

Favorite Poets: Dylon, George Harrison, Leonard Cohen, Jess, Rett, Black Mountain Gang

This user supports Neopoet so it can be free to all

Comments

jane210660

8 years ago

Mark

I've added you to the workshop. Can you edit and scroll down and select Poets' first poems workshop. Then it will be saved on the workshop poems.

jane210660

8 years ago

There should be poets first poems

In your drop down.
You marked it first poem in the title. Is it the first poem you wrote? If you look under workshops you'll see what I mean. It's not a workshop as such, more a bit of fun, looking at the first poem you wrote.
Cheers jx

Geezer

8 years ago

If you want...

to call it free-verse, go ahead, it rhymes enough for me. I like the theme and it would have been good for the Spring poem contest. A couple of lines in there that are a bit long for the rest of the poem, but all in all I would say a very good first poem. ~ Gee.
.

Candlewitch

8 years ago

hello Mark!

dashingly good work here! I would never have thought that this was your first poem! it flows really well and has an interesting theme which held my attention throughout. good language usage and imagery. no forced rhyming found here, like so many first poems contain. much enjoyed this write. good to see you again!

always, Cat

jane210660

8 years ago

Try reloading page

The workshop is showing on my drop down.
Cheers

jane210660

8 years ago

Try reloading page

The workshop is showing on my drop down.
Cheers

scribbler

8 years ago

Hi Mark

Whether intentional or not the change in rhyme pattern in last stanza is very effective.......stan

wesley snow

8 years ago

Yes, an excellent first go.

I would not call this free verse. It is very organized.

weirdelf

7 years 12 months ago

Bloody love the recording!

A bit Tom Waits. It really makes the poem and utterly changes it's feel and import. How did you do the sound background? Your instrumentation? Did you record simultaneously or mix in Audacity or similar?

Thanks for this.