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Barbara Writes
Barbara Writes
Dec 15, 2011 ⭐ View statistics (Premium feature)

Sex and Poetry Writing

Where's the love in you
The love you claim belongs to me
When I fall for your convincing lies 
You shrink back leaving me high and dry

 I gave you my heart, you threw me a bone
A bare bone, lacking flavor
Just as I began to put the past behind me
Your vicious cycle of contempt tires me

I won't toss my safety net 
My zone of friends that love me
I keep it all inside, the joys I reap
From writing poetry, staying true, free

Writing poetry should never be better
Than sex

About This Poem

Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft

About the Author

Region, Country: United States, USA

Favorite Poets: Billy Collins, Shakespeare, , Emily Dickinson, , , Whitman, Jess Tapper

More from this author

Comments

weirdelf

weirdelf

13 years 7 months ago

oh! My dear,

if writing poetry keeps you in your comfort zone, you are not writing poetry.

I tend to agree with the sentiment, the feeling after writing my best poetry is better than after the worst sex.

Nicely written.

Barbara Writes

Barbara Writes

13 years 7 months ago

Comfort zone

if it is not poetry then what do you call it seriously,was trying to find a concept that would work better. I just settled for comfort zone.

Yep good sentiment

weirdelf

weirdelf

13 years 7 months ago

I was being a bit facetious

poetry is supposed to be agonised over, apparently. Not an idea I actually subscribe to.

Perhaps you could come up with something better than comfort zone.

Race_9togo

Race_9togo

13 years 7 months ago

Barbara

The answer is no.
But, of course, I'm a guy, heehee.
This is a joy to read, hard and solid, no punches pulled, and painful in its hurting.

I would only add to Beauregard's critique by saying that the last line of the third stanza might improve with a re-write.

Always good to read you, Barb.

Barbara Writes

Barbara Writes

13 years 7 months ago

Rewrite

Thanks Jim I appreciate your suggestion and glad you like it,
But When some says my poetry needs a rewrite I tend to leave as is unless they tell me what or why it need change.

Barbara Writes

Barbara Writes

13 years 7 months ago

Thanks

i appreciate and have made the changes. Thanks to Jim I realize how bad the last line was after rereading. I have rewritten it.

lou

lou

13 years 7 months ago

Barb

I like this one very much the only thing i would say needs a tweak are the first two lines of the second stanza.

I presume the second line has a double meaning, and that works , but i feel it would be better to say something like ' you throw me a bone, a meaningless favour,' or ' you throw me a bone, stripped bare, nothing to savour'.

Lou

loved

loved

13 years 7 months ago

Do please

take credit
of my poem
composed with ur quotes
thanks

S

scribbler

13 years 7 months ago

hi Barb

Didn't read all comments but you could maybe try safety zone instead of comfort zone.And good sex trumps good poetry because one can Always read good poetry lol............stan

Barbara Writes

Barbara Writes

13 years 7 months ago

Yep

bad sex tuen you attention to writing good poetry or even reading It lol
Thanks for the suggestion

loved

loved

13 years 5 months ago

I thought I had read

this one before
and your question to me
now confronts me
which poetry did i compose
after being inspired by yours...
i shall have to axe my mind
to dig it out perhaps I may.