Shadows that haunt my thoughts

The below is a computer-generated response from Neo, Neopoet's computer artificial intelligence:

The poem "Shadows that haunt my thoughts" employs a rich vocabulary and complex sentence structure, which creates an intricate and layered reading experience. However, the dense and abstract language can sometimes obscure the poem's meaning and make it difficult for readers to connect with the piece on an emotional level.

In the first two lines, the use of alliteration and internal rhyme (e.g., "juggling the jugular of jargon", "golden jar gone per sip") is effective in creating a rhythmic and musical quality. However, the meaning of these phrases is unclear. It would be beneficial to consider whether the sound devices are serving the overall message and theme of the poem, or if they are detracting from it.

The question "Was Niztchie too quick to apply for the presumption of death?" is intriguing, but without further context or exploration, its relevance to the rest of the poem is unclear. If the poet wishes to engage with philosophical ideas or figures like Nietzsche, it would be helpful to integrate these references more fully into the poem.

The line "Cause and effect coarsen affect while soaking dry spells with dyslexic illiterate pen handling" is a striking image, but again, its meaning is not immediately clear. If the intention is to convey a struggle with writing or communication, this could be expressed in a more straightforward way.

The final two lines present a compelling twist on the familiar phrase "the pen is mightier than the sword". This could be a powerful ending, but because the preceding lines are so abstract and difficult to decipher, it's hard for the reader to fully appreciate this conclusion.

In summary, while the poem demonstrates a strong command of language and sound devices, it would benefit from clearer communication of its themes and ideas. This could be achieved by simplifying some of the language, providing more context for references and philosophical ideas, and ensuring that sound devices and complex sentence structures serve the overall message of the poem.

Please send feedback about Neo (our computer generated critique system) to https://www.neopoet.com/contact

But you do understand what AI is saying, right? AI can be a good learning tool.
Later,
Mark

A fine poem for the win! I liked the alliteration.

regards, Cat