Shingles

The below is a computer-generated response from Neo, Neopoet’s AI:

The poem uses the metaphor of "shingles" to convey a sudden, disruptive force that impacts the speaker both physically and emotionally. The structure is a single stanza of eight lines, each line contributing to a cumulative sense of distress and interruption.

The poem’s language is direct and unembellished, which suits the subject matter—shingles as a medical condition is abrupt and harsh, and the poem’s diction mirrors that experience. The use of present-tense verbs ("come," "hitting," "growing," "leaving," "exposing," "slowing") creates immediacy and a sense of ongoing struggle.

The poem’s progression from the initial onset ("come quickly") to the aftermath ("slowing every action to a halt") effectively traces the escalation of symptoms and their impact. The line "Never in spots expected" introduces an element of unpredictability, which is a characteristic of the condition and adds to the sense of vulnerability.

There is a consistent focus on physical sensation and visible symptoms ("ugly splotches"), which grounds the poem in the body. However, the emotional response ("sheer panic") is only briefly touched upon; further exploration of the psychological impact could deepen the poem’s resonance.

The poem’s form is straightforward, with each line functioning as a discrete observation. There is little use of figurative language or imagery beyond the literal description of symptoms. Introducing metaphor, simile, or more sensory detail could enrich the poem and invite readers into a more visceral experience.

The poem’s tone is clinical and somewhat detached, which may reflect the numbing effect of pain or shock. If the intent is to evoke empathy or a more immersive emotional response, consider experimenting with voice or perspective.

Overall, the poem effectively captures the suddenness and severity of shingles, but could be strengthened by expanding its emotional range and incorporating more vivid imagery or figurative language.

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are very painful, too! and once you have them, they are yours forever! they may lay dormant for years, but they can make a comeback at any time. mine did... do you know if there has been a break through on a cure yet? 

something that most people do not know is that you get them on just one side of your body (like the right front and back or the left front and  and back)  I hate to see another person with this malady... it is miserable!

hugs, Cat xxx 

Hello, Clentin,

Ha!  Just got over (I hope) a six week war with shingles.  I'm still limping!  :)  I understand you are not a cursing man, but something in the description of "living hell" would be appropriate.  I have a deeper sense of compassion, empathy, and devotion to prayer for anyone with any type of chronic pain.

Thank you,

L