Neopoet

Join the Neopoet online poetry workshop and community to improve as a writer, meet fellow poets, and showcase your work. Sign up, submit your poetry, and get started.

alidzain
alidzain
Feb 11, 2015 ⭐ View statistics (Premium feature)
This poem is part of the contest:

February 2015 contest

(Read More...)

The Southern Door (Feb Contest)

Close it!
Don't let it open.
I don't want to leave here
where peace resides.

The darkness here is bliss,
the gentle beat of the heart,
the sweetest lullaby.
The warmth here signifies life.

I know I won't stay here forever
A time will come for me to leave
when my body is complete
and I'm too big to stay but..

let it be a whole nine months
before the southern door is wide open
and I leave to meet the world
with all of its beauty and ugliness.

For now let me be here,
embracing peace.

About This Poem

Style/Type: Free verse

Review Request Direction: What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?

Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back

Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft

About the Author

Region, Country: singapore, SGP

Favorite Poets: Emily Dickinson, Robert Frost, Sarojini Naidu and friends in Neopoet.

More from this author

Comments

Rula

Rula

10 years 5 months ago

Salam Khalid

There is a clever thought here. I really like it.
Wish you the best.

R

raj

10 years 5 months ago

Hi Alid

Well done Alid. In a way it is like a tribute to Mothers who provide the most secure place for the fetus to grow till it is ready to face the world...

Regards,

alidzain

alidzain

10 years 5 months ago

Hi Raj

Thanks for the visit and the comment. Its a plea to mothers not to abort their babies as well even though the pregnancy is not they wanted as for examples the one from rapes.

Alid

R

raj

10 years 5 months ago

Alid

I had missed on that ...now that you have explained it makes more sense...shows your sensitivities..

Regards,

R

raj

10 years 5 months ago

Alid

You would soon see what happens when you plant a seed in a fertile land...you have just done that...let us wait and watch for the seedling to germinate in some fertile mind Down Under :)

Regards,

alidzain

alidzain

10 years 5 months ago

ah, judy

now that's good to know. Thanks for the visit and the comments. You're most welcome.

Alid

S

scribbler

10 years 4 months ago

Hi Alid

And why not see this as a door? I'd never have thought of this lol. Thanks for entering......stan

alidzain

alidzain

10 years 4 months ago

lol

Glad that you liked it, Stan. I was trying to think out of the box and it just popped into my mind.

Alid

mand

mand

10 years 4 months ago

Hellooo Alid

Clever and unique - I like it, I think my son felt like that. Lol

Well done Alid - hope all goes well in the contest.

Love Mand xxx