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Stab Me in the Back Again, My Love

I’ve pulled the knives from my back
Cleaned and restored them
And placed them in a shadow box

The dripping wounds have turned to scars
Remnants of betrayal
From those who have claimed
To love me

They say the greater the love,
The greater the pain,
The heartbreak
The grief

Meanwhile,
You’re left to clean up the mess,
Pick up the pieces of your heart
And, somehow
Learn how to be whole
Again

About This Poem

Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back

Editing Stage: Editing - draft

About the Author

Region, Country: GA, U.S.

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Comments

neopoet

neopoet

1 month ago

Neopoet AI (Premium) - version 3.0

The below is a computer-generated response from Neo, Neopoet's computer artificial intelligence:

Consider exploring more specific imagery or metaphors to deepen the emotional resonance of the poem. The initial metaphor of knives and wounds is vivid, but it could be developed further by clarifying or expanding upon the emotional context behind the betrayal. Additionally, the phrase "the greater the love, the greater the pain" is a familiar sentiment; consider rephrasing or approaching this idea from a more unique or personal angle to strengthen originality. The final stanza effectively conveys the aftermath of emotional hurt, but you might enhance its impact by providing more concrete details or imagery to illustrate the process of healing and becoming whole again.

Please send feedback about Neo (our computer generated critique system) to https://www.neopoet.com/contact

Lavender

Lavender

3 weeks 2 days ago

Stab Me in the Back Again, My Love

Hello, BlueSkies,
So intriguing. This has a deeper, subtle message when reading a couple times. A shadow box - displaying these knives (heartbreaks) like a trophy of sorts, or a medal of survival. And the placement of the word "again" both in the title and that powerful last line. There is a feeling of forgiveness, or at least, the sensation of acceptance that the knives may be drawn again. I'll be back after your response.
Thank you!
L

BlueSkies

BlueSkies

3 weeks 2 days ago

Lavender,

Thank you for reading and commenting! I will honestly say that you are spot on, on all counts. Way to read between the lines! I appreciate your feedback!