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May 01, 2017
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Summer's Pests [Trochee attempt][Meter WS]
Winter's gone and soon shall Spring.
Summer's close, on doors upcoming.
Wonder what its wings to bring but
awful pests and cheeks with stings.
About This Poem
Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft
Comments
Rula
8 years 1 month ago
I know :)
Catalectic trochaic tetrameter. I hope it works though as an exercise. I might come up with a pentameter attempt, who knows?
judyanne
8 years 1 month ago
Rula
You forgot to hit to hit the workshop button
xxx
Rula
8 years 1 month ago
Thanks for the reminder
dear Judy.
judyanne
8 years 1 month ago
lol
Forgot to say - good example, a little spot of humour too... I like it
Love judy
xxx
.
Rula
8 years 1 month ago
Thank you
dear judy.
Appreciate the visit :)
wesley snow
8 years 1 month ago
Excellent.
.
Rula
8 years 1 month ago
Thank you
sir.
Geezer
8 years 1 month ago
Just so!...
Nothing to crit. Everything edible. ~ Gee.
.
Rula
8 years 1 month ago
Thank you
Gee.
Rula
8 years 1 month ago
Dear Audri
Thanks for your kind words. I just hoped thatyou could manage more participation, but I understand how life goes dear. Try to have the joy of writing, sometimes it's just all that we need
alidzain
8 years 1 month ago
Salam, Rula
wonderful
Alid
Rula
8 years 1 month ago
Salam Khalid
Thank you.
Rula
8 years 1 month ago
You might be right
Jerry, but it still sounds fine to my ear when I read it aloud.
What about you :)
Rula
8 years 1 month ago
I believe
If you know the rules but occasionally break them (as long as the rhythm still flows well)I think it's ok then. At the moment I am so interested in training a musical ear. I think this is a step beyond just writing with strict meter, but of course you have a point and I completely respect it.
Many thanks for the kind visit.
Rula
8 years 1 month ago
Jerry, I am sorry
for any misunderstanding. I never meant to "rebuke" any of my poet-friends here or anywhere else. Please accept my apology if I unintentionally did. I've been learning meter for years now and yet I am relatively new to all this stuff if compared with the masters in this site, but I am proud of what I have already achieved. To label my ex. as an attempt is what we used to do as participants in the workshops, however, what I am seeking when I participate in each meter workshop is quite different. I have that ambition to develop as a poet with all the tools that I have each time I write.
wesley snow
8 years 1 month ago
This brings up a touchy subject.
My comments should probably be focused on the main thread for everyone, but since EVERYONE reads Rula's work I shall broach it here.
The work we do in this workshop is mechanical. Meaning we should be looking for the strictest of form at expense sometimes of art.
However, it should be taken to heart that metronomic rhythm is not only unnecessary, it is to be viewed as something of an evil.
The metronome is not art. A person will perhaps speak in a comfortable and repeatable metrical rhythm, but naturally will not strictly adhere to it.
Perfect meter is to be frowned upon as it doesn't represent natural speech.
So for the workshop... try to write as a metronome. We are learning the format and must think in square lines and round circles, but when we "write"... allow the format to lead, but not restrict.
There are many paths to the same place.
weirdelf
7 years 12 months ago
Bloody well done, Rula
I'll read it both naturally and stressing the stress.
http://vocaroo.com/i/s1n1K3p3ikdK