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Nov 18, 2010
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Sweet Torture
Orgasmic,
Nuclear melt down,
Stark raving lunacy.
Limbs shake with seismic
Intensity.
Body craves you, like heroin.
You'll be the end of mortality,
I can't release you, need to,
Rap myself around you.
On the edge of a precipice,
And I want to fall.
Sweet torture .
About This Poem
Style/Type: Free verse
Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft
Comments
Hooded Stranger
14 years 7 months ago
Lou
Lou,
how did I miss this one?
You managed to capture the 'frustrations' well in this piece. Great title too!
"I can't realise you, need to" - should that be 'release'?
Wanting to fall off the precipice....brilliant!
HS
lou
14 years 7 months ago
HS
Glad someone finally found this one in the wilderness LOL.
Well you know i'm the typo queen LOL
thanks HS
Lou
Hooded Stranger
14 years 7 months ago
Lou
Dear typo Queen,
you need to remove the space between 'my' and 'self' and make it one word.
Lol!
It was out in the wilderness, but it needs to be brought back into the stream.
regards,
HS