raj

Dec 04, 2018 ⭐ View statistics (Premium feature)

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pods bursting with seeds
get scattered in autumn wind
springing surprises

About This Poem

Style/Type: Structured: Eastern

Review Request Direction: How does this theme appeal to you?

Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back

Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft

About the Author

Region, Country: Somewhere in the world, IND

Comments

raj

6 years 7 months ago

Thanks Mark

for your good words...though to some drafts such...it was my attempt to show how drafts transform into pleasant surprises once worked upon over a period of time [autumn to spring]...in fact this was inspired by the photo "drafts do suck" which i read as "do drafts suck"..:)
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raj

6 years 7 months ago

Mark

that's the intriguing aspect of a poem...where different readers perceive it differently...
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raj

6 years 7 months ago

please feel free Mark. I'm

please feel free Mark. I'm sure you will capture the essence of it.

Namaste..
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raj

6 years 7 months ago

Hi Mark

sounds good to me...however by "springing surprises" the intended meaning is the seeds scattered in autumn become seedlings in spring...so what do you think?
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raj

6 years 7 months ago

Hi Mark

Done. Final. No Longer editing.

Namaste
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lovedly

6 years 7 months ago

in autumn all spring on a spring/swing in a garden/playground

in spring
then their seeds
all spring
how is the inversion
of springing
of seeds
rajji
lol

raj

6 years 7 months ago

read my comment to Mark which

read my comment to Mark which would explain the context..
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lovedly

6 years 7 months ago

You already know

each one has
and is permitted to have
his own perspective
mine mostly is erotic
what my eyes have seen
springing in autumn in parks
seeding em the result is obvious
in later spring
autumn winter and spring 9 months
this is my Western opinion

a poet can only compose
none can dictate
how to read or imagine
except in prose
like the door was open can have no second meaning
it door was open
but in poetry it would or could mean
an invitation to...xyz
just imagine the difference
thanks

IRiz

6 years 7 months ago

I don't think the title helps

I don't think the title helps your poem.
Maybe calling it Drafts is better?

raj

6 years 7 months ago

Yes IRiz.. .i am also

Yes IRiz.. .i am also thinking of changing it..
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