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IH
Ian Hood
Apr 16, 2022 ⭐ View statistics (Premium feature)
This poem is part of the challenge:

Neopet Random Challenge # 14

(Read More...)

There she was...

There she was...

There she was.
Listening to the sound of the sea,
waiting nothing but a whisper,
followed by another one.

The sea, merciless, spoke to her,
speechless and still,
refusing to verbalize any sound or word;
refusing to show any sign of response.

There she stood,
motionless as the plain sea,
torn to pieces by the absent tide,
washed away by the stillness of the waves,
blown to parts by the silent sea.

About This Poem

Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back

Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft

About the Author

Country/Region: Portugal

More from this author

Comments

Candlewitch

Candlewitch

3 years 2 months ago

hello,

it is very nice to meet you! somehow I feel a kinship with the subject of your poem! please feel welcome here. I look forward to reading more of your exquisite poetry!

*hugs, Cat

I

Ian Hood

3 years 2 months ago

Hi

Thank you for your kind words.

One

One

3 years 2 months ago

Dear Ian

Just read your latest & had to jump straight into your first one.

I like your style, allowing the reader to create the images & theme to fit their own outlook & ideas,

Keep them coming, you have a fan.

Talent free poet! Love it!!

One

lovedly

lovedly

3 years 2 months ago

NICE ONE

But just two points
two whispers
too close
and
after a comma
use a small letter
bit of grammar only