These Days

The March winds ripped off
three panels from under the eaves,
hurling them out onto the street.

I heard the "twi-tip, twi-tip, twi-tip"
sound as one car after
another ran over them,

flattening their form, smashing
the metal into recyclable rubble.
I gathered them up, just to be quite

finished with the annoying reverberation
batting at my brain. Off in the distance
a church bell pealed the 4:00 hour, its song

tong
tong
tong
tong

chasing the wind,
somehow a beat behind,
somehow less consoling than most days.

About This Poem

Style/Type: Free verse

Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back

Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft

About the Author

Country/Region: United States

Favorite Poets: I tend to read Ted Kooser, Jim Harrison, Billy Collins, Paul Simon, Robert Frost. I like minimalist poetry, and poems reflecting on nature and Mother Earth.

This user supports Neopoet so it can be free to all

Comments

RoseBlack

2 months 4 weeks ago

The winds

Have been awful. How well I relate to your poem, except I was going out and picking up sections of wood fence only to have the wind knock it back on top of me. I like the description of the panels after a car runs them over. Reminds me of someone battered and run down by circumstances or life. Then the frustration of trying to clean up and rebuild after the destruction. The ringing of the bell provided an eerie feel, almost impending doom like what comes next. Well done.

Lavender

2 months 3 weeks ago

Hello, RoseBlack,

I wrote this on a terribly windy day when I was also a bit annoyed with the state of the world. Can you tell? :) I remember the day felt as you described - destructive and eerie.
Thank you for reading and sharing your wonderful comments!
Lx

Candlewitch

2 months 4 weeks ago

Dear Lavender,

enjoyable and relatable... and another shoe drops...

fondly, Cat

Lavender

2 months 3 weeks ago

Hello, Cat,

Yep, another shoe drops.
Always appreciate your point of view.
Thank you so much!
Lx

Ruby Lord

2 months 4 weeks ago

Hi Lavender, this is rather

Hi Lavender, this is rather good isn't it?
I like your use of onomatopoeia in your lines "twi-tip, twi-tip, twi-tip" That's not any old sound, that's the sound that irritates and intrudes.
And they way you used the church bell to ground us there with you, as if we've almost stopped to hear those church bells ring.
Great job, Ruby xx

Lavender

2 months 3 weeks ago

Hello, Ruby,

I actually found myself walking around the house trying to figure out what the sound was. I knew it wasn't good. Finally opening the front door, I realized it was outside, and a part of the eaves out in the street. It was very irritating. What was more notable was the sound of the church bells. Usually soothing, they seemed intrusive in the moment. Aah, well.
Thank you for reading!
Lx