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Timeless
In a single moment, I closed my eyes
thinking of the past that we've left behind
We have come a long way, my dear,
to find our path to each other
We have fought and reconciled,
we've even separated for awhile
And each time we leave, saying "Never again",
Fate will bring us back together again
Even after the years drift us further apart,
moments that we shared never leave our hearts
Our youths are gone ,weary skin cast over old bones,
still we find beauty is not something to mourn
For love is still there, still burning bright.
the passion still strong, still alive
That's how I know, this feeling is not lust,
it will remain even after we're turned to dust
It'll be there even after the winds of fate erase
our existence and lay us to waste
It will leave traces of our footprints behind,
right there, engraved on the sands of time
The tale of our hearts' triumph here
may it be a legacy in our future
For in all of its elegance,
our love is timeless....
About This Poem
Style/Type: Free verse
Review Request Direction:
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?
Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft
Comments
Ian.T
11 years 3 months ago
Alid
Just like my another year, these memories are cherished, they last for ever no matter what happens between the meets.
A challenge to me where that part is there and I am here know how you feel. On St Patricks day this year it was a memory that has lasted half of my life here.
My present wife though it not necessary still treats the memory as a threat, but all it gives me is a quiet peace and realisation of how beautiful things are here and where ever my world is.
Take care and live in the now, Yours Ian.T
weirdelf
11 years 3 months ago
Just thought you might like to hear this
from another perspective.
http://vocaroo.com/i/s1exUOnsLaWT
alidzain
11 years 3 months ago
wonderful, Jess
Thank you
Alid