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AT TOWN'S EDGE

What little hair I have is white
which peeks from under my hat's brim
as I head home to beat the night.
I pause a moment on a whim
just to look at all I see.

I've stopped between the town and home,
not really country but hardly town,
where both house cats and white tails roam
and not all trees have been cut down.
I shift my weight off old sore knee.

The sun winks off behind the trees
as wood ducks whistle toward the marsh
a whippoorwill begins his tease.
A lone hawk screams out loud and harsh
while a squirrel sprints up his den tree.

One by one the stars ignite,
the harvest moon begins to rise
as day time segues into night.
Far away a mournful coyote cries
as a nearby pet dog barks at me.

Lights and their windows now switch on
announcing the final end of day,
reminding me it's time I'm gone.
From home I've been too long away;
toward hearth and love my feet now hurry.

About This Poem

Style/Type: Structured: Western

Review Request Direction: What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?

Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back

Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft

About the Author

Region, Country: South Carolina, United States, USA

Favorite Poets: Frost, Burns, Longfellow, Poe, and Johnson. I guess you've noticed these are all past masters. Other than folks on site I don't read any contemporary poets .

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More from this author

Comments

Roscoe Lane

Roscoe Lane

11 years ago

As far,

As far as direction goes this is perfect in my eyes, i have paused with that very sore knee. But you have given it life in words. Great poem. Regards Roscoe...

S

scribbler

11 years ago

Hi Roscoe

Thank you for such kind comment but even I know it's not perfect lol. Appreciate your time to drop by........stan

Robert Melliard

Robert Melliard

11 years ago

Natural rhyme

I greatly admire your ability to find rhymes without bending meaning or altering a normal word-order. I also like you evident sensibility towards birds and animals, and other evocative details in this poem.
Best wishes,
Robert.

S

scribbler

11 years ago

Hi Robert

Thank you for such a supportive remark. I usually use pastoral based themes because most of my scribbling is fairly peaceful in nature. I figure there are plenty of poets covering the ugly side of the world so I try to give people a place to retreat to..............stan

lovedly

lovedly

11 years ago

Your poetic mastery is astounding

your path is gradually rounding
and
as for hair you say
you can boast of some
I have none........

so to conceal my headlly kingdom
a hat i do wear
but seldom

long live my head without a hat
some day I shall too pass away
without a hat
and
maybe like a rat

no soul shall leave my frail body
what's it a heavenly one
well still a soul LOVEDLY
has none!
amen

S

scribbler

11 years ago

Hi

The hats I wear
cut down on the glare
which comes from a head
with hair mostly dead.....lol
Appreciate your dropping by..........stan

lovedly

lovedly

11 years ago

glad you do say

Appreciate your dropping by..

another guy had the cheeks to say

appreciate your droppings!!!!!.....
lol what!

S

scribbler

11 years ago

lol

I'm not That desperate ...yet lol....stan