Lavender

Sep 26, 2022 ⭐ View statistics (Premium feature)

Undisciplined

I want my food
I want my internet service
I want to be first in line
traffic to get out of my way
and my pizza delivered on time

I want the best
phone
television
sneakers
vehicle with the best
sound system

I want my politician to win
my thoughts and beliefs to be right
and my way of living to be left undisturbed

I want to be able to trample my footprints
through fields of tender flowers
just to manifest that I was there
***

About This Poem

Style/Type: Free verse

Review Request Intensity: I appreciate moderate constructive criticism

Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft

About the Author

Country/Region: United States

Favorite Poets: I tend to read Ted Kooser, Jim Harrison, Billy Collins, Paul Simon, Robert Frost. I like minimalist poetry, and poems reflecting on nature and Mother Earth.

This user supports Neopoet so it can be free to all

Comments

Michael Anthony

2 years 9 months ago

Excellent look into the

Excellent look into the culture of me, me, me - well done L! The 4th line in first stanza seems like it would benefit from an "and" in front of traffic. Maybe like this:

and traffic to get out of my way
Deliver my pizza on time!

Really enjoyed this - thank you!

Best

Lavender

2 years 9 months ago

It seems we fall into 4 "me/my" categories: myself, my stuff, my way of living, and my space on this earth. It's good to take inventory from time to time. I will think about your generous suggestion. Thank you very much for reading and sharing your thoughts!
L

lovedly

2 years 9 months ago

Beautiful FREE VERSE

All for you
wow

Lavender

2 years 9 months ago

Hello, Lovedly,

I'm glad you liked this one. It's a bit negative in nature with its sarcasm.
Thank you very much for reading!
L

lovedly

2 years 9 months ago

I LOVE when truth spills

and Lav minuscule speak like thee
keep going you have found
a profound
space already
all neo knows it

Geezer

2 years 9 months ago

Nothing much to add...

This satirical offering is a great piece to show how the "Me Generation" has gained control of the world. Well done! ~ Geezer.
.

Lavender

2 years 9 months ago

Hi, Geezer,

I appreciate you taking time to read. I'm hoping there are not quite as many "me" types out there as my poem suggests.
Thank you!
L

Administrative…

2 years 9 months ago

Yes indeed

It's about growing up to me. I want is a very juvenile perhaps even toddler stage of life, before we realize that we can't until we earn it.
Very nice reading lavender.
Mark

Lavender

2 years 9 months ago

Thank you, Mark!

Always appreciate your thoughts!
L

RoseBlack

2 years 9 months ago

Me Society

A good depiction of what society has become. No one seems to want to work and earn anymore and those of us who do work and earn, can't get a leg up. Things are definitely backwards. Good job.