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Feb 19, 2013
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Unfinished 10/2010
31.10.10
Uh Oh...Poem
Woman know you are his home
In him, for you only has been placed a compass
A tenderhood lives within his soul
And he lists
Always to you
Of his heart comes the certain sweetness
Even as manhood's brusque gruff barnacles coat
No matter where
Or with whom
He is home
In you
*******
About This Poem
Style/Type: Free verse
Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft
Comments
Ian.T
12 years 8 months ago
gdireneoe
Firstly welcome to Neopoet and I hope that you will enjoy your stay with us..
Fresh theme's and looks at life are so welcome, there are a few workshops that are running and some we look forward to, so that we can teach or learn this art of writing. So have a great time..
Always try to put a title to your poem it shouldn't be that hard to find something, and try not to use the first line keep it to an overall picture of the poems theme, this one for instance could be "Ties" or along those lines then the theme would drift around that idea..
This theme makes a change from the normal and I enjoyed it.
The love that the man holds as a compass heading no matter what, and that home within a woman that is there in this case.
I don't want to be sexist, and say this is the norm that the little lady makes the home and the male, has this built in objective, to many this is in dream time only, LOL
Take care out there, Yours Ian.T
Frenchf
12 years 8 months ago
This is an interesting write
but the title intrigued me. I felt it led us back to 2010 but needed an update for 2013