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C
Conect11
Jul 07, 2018 ⭐ View statistics (Premium feature)

Unstuck

Let's get unstuck,
you and I
and change our routine.

Today
we can fix the things
that are broken.
Or at least we can start.

All it takes
I believe
are a few steps,
and a clearing of my mind.

And if the wind doesn't wake you
you won't be disturbed.

About This Poem

Style/Type: Structured: Western

Review Request Direction: What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?

Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back

Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft

About the Author

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Comments

Eumolpus

Eumolpus

7 years ago

very cool poem

I really like the end. I do not fully "understand" it, I feel what it means. That makes it very good poetry to me!

And if the wind doesn't wake you
you won't be disturbed.

So many possibilities of meaning. Nicely done!

IRiz

IRiz

7 years ago

Simple and seemingly

Simple and seemingly unpoetical content in each line comes together as a poem. I like it and not sure where is the trick. Perhaps in the umbiguity of the last lines? The image of an unconscient or dead partner scares and confuses me. Great poem.