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Geremia
Geremia
Dec 31, 2015 ⭐ View statistics (Premium feature)

VOL DE NUIT rewritten

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VOL DE NUIT

sudden silences, different paths,
forsaken friendships of the past,
parallel lines intersecting
for a while,
feeding lies , faking words
faking smiles
abrupt endings
night flight to tangential lives
as we live so we die
alone
no one left to cry

About This Poem

Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft

About the Author

Country/Region: USA

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Comments

Geezer

Geezer

9 years 6 months ago

Usually...

I ask a poet, if they might find a way, to shorten the lines, but in this case, I kind of agree with Wes.
I'd like to see a more elegant, descriptive wording. I see the finality and the end of the poem. ~ Gee