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A Walk at Twilight.

Come walk with me my lady
Through lanes on autumns eve.
The sky, no light to taint it
A spell on us will weave.

Walk slow with me my lady,
No words we need to say,
The night will do the talking
As its magic does hold sway.

We’ll hear the night birds calling,
Sense bats that flutter round
Hear Reynard bark at distance
By his den beneath the ground.

Stand still, hold still and listen,
You hear that Nightbird call?,
A Raven silent, wings to roost;
You hear the cattle bawl?.

Above the blackness seems alive
By countless diamonds lit.
Your eyes are like that endless night
They flash, and I submit.

Walk on with me my Lady,
Of words we have no need.
Love has its way of showing
In silence and in deeds.

The night is Oh! So calm.
Soon the moon will rise
As we stand high above the vale
Cloaked by the starlit skies.

And now my lady in a glade,
With wild gorse all around.
Its yellow blossom all year blooms
It watches us laydown.

There in the glade in starlight glow
My Faerie Queen I’ll come to know.
To mystic lands she’ll bear me far
While high above a burning star
Like dragon’s breath will scorch the sky.
As on Hellfire's hills our souls do fly.

About This Poem

Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back

Editing Stage: Editing - polished draft

About the Author

Country/Region: Isle of Wight United Kingdom

Favorite Poets: Poe, Swinburn, Bob Dylan, Spike Milligan, Alfred Noyes, Kipling., Many Others.

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Comments

RoseBlack

RoseBlack

2 years 5 months ago

Breathtaking

This has left me speechless. Reminds me of a song by Shaman called Fairy Tale. This is utterly romantic and so elegantly written. I love the flow, the language and the entire premise of the poem. Well done!

Alex Tanner

Alex Tanner

2 years 5 months ago

Hello Rose.

Thank you Rose. As it is Sunday and I am staying in today I will have to listen to that piece. Alex

RoseBlack

RoseBlack

2 years 5 months ago

Hi Alex

Let me know what you think of it if you do give it a listen!

Alex Tanner

Alex Tanner

2 years 5 months ago

Yes

Liked it enormously. Downloaded 2 copies, one a live performance and another with the lyrics. you might like to try (if you haven't) an animated version of The Highwayman, one of my favourite poems by Alfred Noyes sung by Loreena McKennett and also her version of The Lady of Shallott . I had to learn that at school many many years ago. Alex

Alex Tanner

Alex Tanner

2 years 5 months ago

Hello Kat

Thank you Kat. Seems I am making a rod for my own back. Now I shall have to work twice as hard. Alex

Rosewood Apothecary

Rosewood Apothecary

2 years 5 months ago

Woah

Above the blackness seems alive
By countless diamonds lit.
Your eyes are like that endless night
They flash, and I submit.

Everything is ridiculous here but that stanza rocks man.

Tim

Lavender

Lavender

2 years 5 months ago

A Walk at Twilight

Hello, Alex,
A romantic and sensual poem - a wonderful build up to that final intense line. The references to the wild surroundings add to the magic. I'm not certain of the word "wreak" - it has a heaviness to it, and usually denotes negative connotations. It seems to weigh down that stanza a bit, and feels different from all your other graceful language.
Magically romantic~
L

Alex Tanner

Alex Tanner

2 years 5 months ago

A Walk at Twilight

Hello L. You are quite right and I racked my brains over just how to phrase it. How does,

Walk slow with me my lady
No words we need to say
The night will do its talking
As its magic does hold sway.

That was the original.
Alex

Lavender

Lavender

2 years 5 months ago

Hello, Alex,

I very much like this original, especially using sway as a noun as in mastery or dominion - it gives a regal, mysterious feeling. Very poetic language that flows and blends in with the nature of your poem.
Again, magically romantic!
L

Seren

Seren

2 years 5 months ago

Dear Alex

This is astonishing. I've read this a few times and everytime I read it I get something new from it.

Sigh this is so beautiful.

Magnifico!!!

Kind regards Seren/Jayne

Alex Tanner

Alex Tanner

2 years 5 months ago

Hello Jayne

I'm so pleased with your reaction but now I wonder if I can keep up and build on the standards I am setting myself. Alex