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Oct 29, 2013
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Wannabe
bare bulb
flicks / flecks
cracked plaster ceiling
dangling
a frizzy / frazzeled string
swinging and swaying as
upstairs thumpers
loving steady
rock
rhythems of humdrum
perfunctory
a smokey glaze distorts
disturbing soot faced
backstreet manoevers,
and all the goings-on of
a dirty downtown byway
my home away
today
to play
the starving artist, man!
an anorexic of comfort
suffering culture
through stereotypical cliches;
the cold-cocking shock
of poverty, loneliness, failure,
and its strange allure
I start my inevitable pacing
About This Poem
Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft
Comments
Roscoe Lane
11 years 11 months ago
This is,
This is very good, i can picture the dispair with every line. Regards Roscoe...
brittle light
11 years 11 months ago
Roscoe
thanks for the complementary words.
very much appreciated.
Seren
11 years 11 months ago
Hey :)
The Steps into sadness and despair for the world around you, its depicted beautifully as only you can do, its nice to read you I have been away a while so I have missed reading everyone
thanks for this excellent piece its great to come back and read such quality work
love JC xxx
brittle light
11 years 11 months ago
hello JC
I too have been absent for about 4-5 months. This is the second piece since being back.
thank you for your kind words.
let's both hope for a long run this time around on Neopoet. I miss it when not participating.