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Jan 22, 2023
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The way of water
mirrored mountains gleam
ripples erase reflection
water moves away
About This Poem
Last Few Words: Edit:- I changesd the whole second line.
Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing Stage: Editing - polished draft
Comments
RoseBlack
2 years 5 months ago
Short and simple
Yet the imagery says so much...well done!
Seren
2 years 5 months ago
Dear RoseBlack
Thank you I'm happy you liked it!!
Kind regards Jayne xxx
Seren
2 years 5 months ago
Dear Mark
You're right I've updated this one I actually only had the taps to begin with somehow the M capitalised itself somewhere along the lines.
Thanks for the heads up
Kind regards Jayne x
Lavender
2 years 5 months ago
The Way of Water
Hello, Seren,
This is peaceful and serene, yet has just the right touch of motion. Wonderful.
L
Seren
2 years 5 months ago
Dear Lavender
Thank you I am so glad you liked it. Haiku is something I dabble in from time to time
Kind regards Jayne x
Candlewitch
2 years 5 months ago
dear Jayne,
excellent haiku! very visual words.
*hugs, Cat
Seren
2 years 5 months ago
Dearest Cat
Thank you I'm so happy you liked it.
Hugs & love always Jayne xxxx
Candlewitch
2 years 5 months ago
5-7-5
is my count.
*Love, Cat
Seren
2 years 5 months ago
Yep that's what I keep
Yep that's what I keep getting too!!!
Love Always Jayne xxx
Seren
2 years 5 months ago
Dear Ekaterina
That's a lovely thing to say!! Thanks so much. I'm a blank slate until I put my headphones on. I always listen to instrumental music never songs with lyrics. I find that sometimes being a singer it can influence the process.
I am so happy that you like it
Hugs Jayne xxx
lovedly
2 years 5 months ago
Haikus are
5 7 5 oe 17 syllables May get it checked by an expert Seren
Seren
2 years 5 months ago
Hmmm
Maybe I am counting wrong but I counted it to be 5,7,5.
shrug hmmm anybody got time to check for me?
Thanks Lovely. I will make sure to get it checked by an expert
I'm nearly done with your poem lovely.
Love J xxx
lovedly
2 years 5 months ago
Seren
you know I can't count
never mind
if I could count then USA POETESS
who took pains at teaching me
SONNETRY
wouldn't have failed
May God bless her soul
Yeah I am anxious enough to know ...the whole truth ...worth ....as a neo poet
Thanks Seren sis
Seren
2 years 5 months ago
All good easy enough mistake
All good easy enough mistake to make.
Don't sweat it!!!
Love ya Sis
Seren
2 years 5 months ago
Big smile
You got it!!!
I had an epiphany tonight. That second line bothered the heck out of me soooo. Here it is my brain has stopped itching now. Lol
Jayne