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S
scribbler
Jan 02, 2020 ⭐ View statistics (Premium feature)

WELL OF SILENCE

Like so many countless others
I sit and scribble on a page
about love, nature or long past brothers
or consequences of accruing age,

And I spill my soul and heart
along with ink in every write
trying to put music in each part
often in the closeness of late night.

Tonight I sit here in the dark
beneath a halo of floor lamp
with memories of a singing lark
while outside the storm blows cold and damp.

I know some storm will be my last.
I know it's closer than it was.
I know I've less future than past.
I know time passes without pause.

Yet still I put my pen to page
in hopes each poem will turn out well
but errant thoughts still make me rage.
Will my poems fall into a silent well
once I write my final page?

About This Poem

Style/Type: Structured: Western

Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back

Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft

About the Author

Region, Country: South Carolina, United States, USA

Favorite Poets: Frost, Burns, Longfellow, Poe, and Johnson. I guess you've noticed these are all past masters. Other than folks on site I don't read any contemporary poets .

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Comments

Geezer

Geezer

5 years 6 months ago

This is...

a good one! A little ragged at the end, but as always, deep thoughts that resonate with us older folks. ~ Gee.
.

S

scribbler

5 years 6 months ago

Hi Gee

I hesitate to be thankful that this resonates with you lol. But we must all face doubts mustn't we?

S

Sparrow 42

5 years 6 months ago

Stan

All OK and a neat piece about how you are nearly old lol.
One word right at the start could do with replacement.
" myriad " it was used and maybe still in translation of the old languages.
It has a straight meaning of 10000 and to me seems alien to your piece.
Happy new year and look after yourselves out there ,
Yours as always Ian ..

S

scribbler

5 years 6 months ago

Ah

After myriad years and myriad poems on myriad subject written in myriad forms I still get myriad words wrong lmao. Appreciate the visit and will check out the use of myriad on edit

lovedly

lovedly

5 years 6 months ago

You know- you don't know-you forgot to wish 2020 to many incl m

I know some storm will be my last.
I know it's closer than it was.
I know my future is less than my past.
I know time passes without pause.
MAY BE ...

I know some storm will be my last.
it's closer than it was.
my future is less than my past.
time passes without pause.

A knowledgeable poet should avoid repetition
I SUPPOSE
rest it's your compo
scribble on as you wish
HNY 2020 STAN and Susan

S

scribbler

5 years 6 months ago

Hi Loved

I think intentional repetition can be a good thing in emphasizing a point.But I could easily be wrong. Thanks for dropping by

S

scribbler

5 years 6 months ago

Hi chima

Thank you for dropping by and leaving such kind comment

faithmairee

faithmairee

5 years 6 months ago

Well of Silence

So good to read your work again! I have missed doing it. This poem is profound and easily relatable. Very nicely done!

S

scribbler

5 years 6 months ago

Hi Faith

It's good to have you back and thank you for taking time to comment on this scribble

C

cathy mccormick

5 years 6 months ago

love this. last two lines'

love this. last two lines' rhythm brings to my mind the sick rose which i love. regarding the comment on knowledgeable poets avoiding repetition, that is the first time i ever heard that. there are reasons poets sometimes use it and a knowledgeable poet should know that.

S

scribbler

5 years 6 months ago

Hi Cathy

I have often heard it's best to avoid the close repetition of the same word but I think they mean random close repeat.I am always pleased to see you drop by........stan

Roscoe Lane

Roscoe Lane

5 years 6 months ago

Never fear,

Never fear though I don't always comment I always read your poetry. Regards Roscoe...

S

scribbler

5 years 6 months ago

Hi Roscoe

Thank you. I appreciate knowing that there are folks who enjoy my chicken scratches lol

Gracy

Gracy

5 years 5 months ago

First line

Hi, I'm new here, so I apologize if I say anything offensive. Don't think so, it's not my style. Have quite a lot of published poems and came second in IBPC in December 2019.
I love all of your poem, except for the first line. I'm not in favour of beginning with "like" and I agree with others that myriad is over used, though I've often used it myself. The end rhymes are perfect. I'm not good at fixed forms, tho' I've composed several sonnets that I might post here to get iambics and so on correctly.

S

scribbler

5 years 5 months ago

Hi Gracy

And welcome to newport. No need worry about offending me for posting your honest opinion. I'll likely do an edit on this one in a few days and when I do I'll keep your and others' suggestions in mind. BTW if you have any problems on site just holler at me and if I can't help I'll steer you to somebody who can

Edna Sweetlove

Edna Sweetlove

5 years 5 months ago

Gracy,

I have found the easiest way to find some poems to comment upon is to click on the "Tools" tab at the top of the page and then to click on "Track all site activity" which lists all the items which have been most recently posted/commented on/edited - it also shows how many comments have been made on each one, so you could go for a poem not yet read/commented on if you wished.
.

S

scribbler

5 years 5 months ago

I appreciate

your beating me to a response. Always good to point new members in the right direction

Edna Sweetlove

Edna Sweetlove

5 years 5 months ago

One tries....

..doesn't one?

Breakinglogic

Breakinglogic

2 years ago

Long time...

Because no one else has mentioned it, I like the connection you made with Sound of Silence. :) The reference was a good way to summon some of the same sentiment. It's that kind of pizazz that makes your work interesting. Second and fourth stanzas are my favorite. And since we're all taking stances on the use of repetition, I'd have to say I'm very pro! Alliteration and even meter are types of repetition. Theme and tone are built through forms of repetition. Repeating whole words can no less enrich your work.
Anyways, glad to have ran into this!

S

scribbler

2 years ago

greetings

Long time no see. You are spot on with the Sound of Silence . comment since it was the source of inspiration for this one. Repetition can either work or not. I use it sparingly so as to not wear it out lol. Thanks for dropping by