brittle light

Aug 02, 2017 ⭐ View statistics (Premium feature)

Where Lies The Truth?

the mountain looks spectacular
but I have come seeking the man on top

a sherpa is arranging my equipment

"have you ever met the man" I ask

"yes, many times " he says

"is it true what they say about him?"

"hey man, I'm just a guy
that has to lug your shit
up the mountain
and back down again.
Does that sound like a happy ending to you?"

I thought about it for a minute,
went into the base camp bar
and got drunk.

About This Poem

Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back

Editing Stage: Editing - draft

About the Author

Region, Country: upstate New York USA, USA

Comments

jane210660

8 years 2 months ago

A sharp dose of reality

I like the perspectives in this.
I'm a bit into perspective at the moment.

brittle light

8 years 2 months ago

I guess I am too.

I guess I am too.
so, thank you Lady Jane

top.ksgnr

8 years 2 months ago

I really like the approach that you took with this poem! I feel like we under appreciate people every day, and we should be nicer to everyone that we encounter! but I also liked your narrative perspective from it.

brittle light

8 years 2 months ago

thanks newbie

thanks newbie
glad you found something to grab onto in this piece.
Ill check out your stuff soon.

Geezer

8 years 2 months ago

Could be...

that he was just having a bad day! Lol. I really like that droll, sarcastic, sense of humor!
Your short works never fail to tickle my funny-bone and at least make me chuckle. ~ Gee.

brittle light

8 years 2 months ago

Just a bad day or not, it

Just a bad day or not, it gives a perspective on the effect "the man" has on others.

glad you get the droll
thanks,

eightmenout

8 years 2 months ago

Al

What an intricate and delicate scene you have woven. Seems to be more to it than just the beautiful pattern of tongue in cheek words.

brittle light

8 years 2 months ago

HELLO SCOTT

I suppose.
I try to look at the people around "the man", the boss, the mentor, et al.
That provides some insight, a more circumspect perspective on who he is(?) or portends to be.

thanks for the very flattering observations.

Haven't heard from you in awhile.
good to hear from you again,