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WOKE UP THIS MORNIN'
You can talk about your symphonies,
Your chamber group ensembles
Your operatic arias
Your Anthems, hymns and spirituals.
But my soul is touched by far
By the down-and-dirty licks
Of a funky Blues guitar
And melancholy lyrics
Electric or acoustic,
Righteous players give it life,
And sing of being down and out
And hard times full of strife.
“If I didn’t have bad luck
I’d have no luck at all”
Faded love
One-sided love
Heartache and pain
Bein’ wronged
Doin’ wrong,
Cryin’ in the rain
Sins to atone
Gettin’ stoned
Drinkin’ to forget
All alone
Prayin’ God to show the way,
Prayin’ for a better day.
And when I’ve had too many beers
And cry with every song I hear
And every vocal punches in the gut,
The Blues has done its job,
There’s catharsis in each sob,
And I can look back on my life
And carry on.
About This Poem
Last Few Words: The second stanza breaks meter a tad. Is that bothersome? I don't follow a structured meter throughout anyway. I tried to italicize the line "If I didn't have bad luck ..." to indicate that it's from an actual song. Does that come across? Apparently you can not use italics on this site. No,I'm not suicidal. So don't call 911. Mike
Review Request Direction: What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing Stage: Editing - draft
Comments
Esker
8 years 12 months ago
Diggin it man!
the feeling comes through
the bar below my room
at the motel plays sixties
ode...the older crowd
up here..
I didnt wear life as hard
as some..but I felt it
its in the marrow
all I know.
Thanks!
judyanne
8 years 12 months ago
i like this
To tell the truth, I was at first put off by the break in structure throughout.... but that is probably just me....
You can italicize .... check out
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/asking-any-questionsusing-your-compute…
Love judy
xxx