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Oct 01, 2024
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Working Mom
I have a new boss
She calls me mom
She tells me what to do
Graveyard shifts, sleepless nights
Always on call too
It's a new job
In An entirely different field
One, where the requirements
I never thought I could fulfill
It's not easy, takes a lot of patience,
A lot of Love and tender care
It may not be a job for everyone
But man, I do love it here!
At times, I do get frustrated
Most times I'm exhausted
But the benefits are worthwhile
The pay isn't necessarily what you'd expect
But it's definitely worth the time.
About This Poem
Review Request Direction:
What did you think of my title?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Review Request Intensity: I appreciate moderate constructive criticism
Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft
Comments
neopoet
8 months 3 weeks ago
Neopoet AI 5-29-23 version
The below is a computer-generated response from Neo, Neopoet's computer artificial intelligence:
The poem "Working Mom" effectively captures the challenges and rewards of being a mother, likening the experience to a new job. The metaphor of the child as a boss is clever and adds depth to the portrayal of the mother's role. The poem conveys the sense of dedication and love required for this job, highlighting the sacrifices and fulfillment that come with it.
One suggestion for improvement could be to explore more vivid imagery or sensory details to enhance the reader's connection to the emotions expressed in the poem. Additionally, consider varying the rhythm or structure to create more impact in certain lines or stanzas. Overall, the poem effectively conveys the complexities of motherhood and the unique "job" it entails.
Please send feedback about Neo (our computer generated critique system) to https://www.neopoet.com/contact
Lavender
8 months 3 weeks ago
Working Mom
Well, Hello, Merlicka!
Welcome to Neopoet, and congratulations as it appears you are a new Mother! Your poem brings a smile to my face, as it perfectly describes motherhood - grave night shifts, and all. I enjoyed your wonderful poem. Thank you for sharing, and best wishes to you and your new little one!
Lavender
Merlicka
8 months 3 weeks ago
Thank you
I appreciate you Lavender. Thanks very much. Glad that you enjoyed it .
Merlicka
8 months 3 weeks ago
Thank you
I appreciate you Lavender. Thanks very much. Glad that you enjoyed it .
Leslie
8 months 3 weeks ago
Merlicka
I remember the days when I was younger and went through a tiny bit of what you're going through. This was a writing of great love and tenderness. I hope you are able to enjoy motherhood and not be too overburdened. - John
Merlicka
7 months 3 weeks ago
Thank you
Thank you John. Your feedback is much appreciated