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CN
Craig Norris
Jun 05, 2009 ⭐ View statistics (Premium feature)

in the clean blue

Perhaps we shall live again
these pastures, that mountain side,
where the strong roofed house
with ochre walls is waiting,
lazy curling smoke
writing in the clean blue.

Rich fields of grasses and of flowers,
teeming tips of sticky seed heads
down to roots,
with buzzing crawling myriads
of insect life,
standing still brings its invasion,
launched from bare kissed soles
those ramparts leading to your knees,
journeys of infuriating crawling little feet
tracing patterns on the skin.

Run again, let the grasses sweep them
and take you on those younger days,
wave to me
amidst the waving grasses,
I shall meet you there.
— Craig Norris, Jun 05, 2009

About the Author

Country/Region: AUS

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Critiques

Cloudthings

Cloudthings

17 years ago

This is too beautiful to overlook Craig, the first stanza is alm

This is too beautiful to overlook Craig, the first stanza is almost devastatingly wonderful. You are so incredibly resilliant, it s a blessing I hope for you. Lovely write~ Anni ~~~ "The moment one gives close attention to anything, even a blade of grass, it becomes a mysterious, awesome, indescribably magnificent world in itself" Henry Miller
CN

Craig Norris

17 years ago

Thankyou Anni

I appreciate your comments, I like this little one too, and your Henry Miller quote. Love. Craig
Seren

Seren

17 years ago

Craig ...

Lovely write poignant and wistful in thought , only have one thing that didnt feel right Perhaps we shall live again these pastures, that mountain side, If you have already lived there together shouldn't it be? Perhaps we shall live again Those pastures , that mountain And the third line might be better? where our strong roofed house with ochre walls is waiting I dont know I had trouble with the tense's you used but that could be just me Craig these are just suggestions my friend And that first verse is that good it was worth a look I thought Hope you didnt mind me doing this I was bored and this poem took my fancy Much Love and Regard Jayne x
CN

Craig Norris

17 years ago

Thanks Jayne

Appreciate your comments, and for taking the time. The tenses are exactly where I want them in this, you can take the first line and *these pastures* in an allegorical sense for the rediscovery of love.*The strong roofed house* being the place we want to find ourselves where love lives. I'm trying to move away from too literal descriptions of scenes, occasionally, so thanks again,for your patience and your time. Love. Craig
CN

Craig Norris

17 years ago

canvases of the heart

So glad you like this one, I'm quite happy with the way of it. the waving rolling grasses in mountain meadows with summer colouring in. Love. Craig
O

orgami

17 years ago

yes I experienced this

the thick feel of insects of grasses on simple shoes for summer not the good shoes saved for school flip flops sandals shorts the hot leap of sun I faltered ON "waves" and then "waves" on that passage "waves" "grasses weaving" maybe? the balance threw me its okay its not a large distraction that takes away from the whole of this innocent air you have the cinematic air of your poetic lens smiling on this summer day too! thanks
CN

Craig Norris

17 years ago

grasses waving

thanks for your comments O, much appreciated, that line tries to capture for me, the waves that roll across the tops of taller grasses when wind moves across a field or paddock. It looks like ripples on a pond or lake, quite beautiful in the green. I try and I try again. Thanks. Cheers. Craig
CN

Craig Norris

17 years ago

love that

That's quite a reaction Bek, thanks for the read and the comments, so glad you enjoyed. love. Craig
B

bjp

17 years ago

Craig,

Lovely images. A place for calm, sturdy romance. Your continued work provides its own kind of calm, like a road one travels with frequency. Brian
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Craig Norris

17 years ago

I like that

a calm sturdy romance, sounds very enduring, that's got to be a good thing. Along with a dash of passion of course. Cheers. Craig
O

orgami

17 years ago

"you wave to me from there Among the grasses waving"

I see why i found it that way I understand i now I read it as a question because we were always putting people on buses after a visit Wave to me when you get on the bus!! okay I get it now great poem my freind! love the grass waves in wind
CN

Craig Norris

17 years ago

thanks O

you got me looking and I've made an adjustment, thanks. Craig
Janice Pearce

Janice Pearce

17 years ago

in the clean blue

Craig, First off, Loved this one from you! had trouble with the use of wave, and waving in the last stanza, felt it took away from the poem somewhat. [this could be just me] Lovely write~ ______________________________________________________ Income-tax forms should be more realistic by allowing the taxpayer to list "Uncle Sam" as a dependent Anonymous
CN

Craig Norris

17 years ago

cheers Janice

thanks for reading and commenting, I appreciate it and have looked again at the last stanza. I made a simple adjustment which I think takes care of that little ambiguity, well I hope so. I do like the wave amidst the waving and your comment helped me, so thanks heaps. Love. Craig

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