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R
raj
Feb 14, 2018 ⭐ View statistics (Premium feature)
This poem is part of the workshop:

Sunku: beyond rhyme and rhythm, search for new structures in short form

(Read More...)

Cold Valentine Kisses [Sunku Workshop]

Winter
opens her
darkest closet

Silence
awakens
intimate sighs

Stirring
wailing storms
lulling within

About This Poem

Review Request Direction: What did you think of my title?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?

Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back

Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft

About the Author

Region, Country: Somewhere in the world, IND

More from this author

Comments

IRiz

IRiz

7 years 4 months ago

I feel you are perfecting the

I feel you are perfecting the art of Sunku with every poem you write as if you leave a trace of footsteps on the snow that is ready to melt. Soon it will be gone, but the white islands of pressed snow will lead.
Sorry for poetic nonsense, but you put me in the mood.
That is what a good poem does to people. So I think you have successfully completed the learning curve.

R

raj

7 years 4 months ago

Thanks for the read and

Thanks for the read and encouragement.

Your poetic comment "you leave a trace of footsteps on the snow that is ready to melt. Soon it will be gone, but the white islands of pressed snow will lead" is not at all non sense....I am happy it was inspired by the poem.

Your comment about learning curve is like a dose of tonic and will make me yearn to learn more...

Thanks again

R

raj

7 years 4 months ago

never undermine yourself

never undermine yourself Lovedly...keep on trying...I am sure you will come good in this form sonner or later..

Cheers!

lovedly

lovedly

7 years 4 months ago

thanks more later

than sooner
try a LOVEDLU also
will you
or just lemme pass by
Any thing that is creative
one need not justify
let a reader's vision in the wilderness fly
stars will seemingly fly
and say g'bye